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Am I the only one, or does this sound like you sometimes?

Maria (formerly NAS88629)
over 1 year ago

Hi, everybody. I'll try to get to the point without blabbering on.

I have not been formally diagnosed, but it's obvious. I'm a woman in my 50s and although I'm not particularly interested in social interaction, I *am* tired of being "the only one who_____" all the time. Anyone relate?

  • I have no desire for social interaction but I'm not unfriendly or grumpy.
  • I don't care what I wear (no interest in fashion) so I don't look like most ladies my age who like to shop. I don't look wild/bad or anything and I do get dressed lol. But I stand out as not like the others.
  • You'll never see me in heels or ladies' dress shoes. Why suffer?
  • I don't care if it's cold; I'll wear ski pants, big warm gloves, and hats in the winter while ladies my age wear fashionable stuff. I'd rather be warm.
  • I cut my own hair. It looks fine (simple long hair "style") and have no desire to do the crap most women do with their hair.
  • I've never had a mani-pedi and never will.
  • Believe it or not, I'm still considered "cute" somehow (so I've been told) but I have no interest in dating even if people ask sometimes. I have in the past, but been there, done that. Love being single.
  • I prefer to live alone but with animals.
  • Animals (dogs/cats) are my "people." I feel closer to them than humans. I grieve their loss as much/more than humans.
  • I do work and believe it or not, I am an entertainer who teaches and performs. I can be charming and fun, but it's from decades of learning how to flip the switch and be like that.
  • I do not go to places most people go (restaurants, bars, church, events). I go outside alone in nature (hiking, kayaking, etc.). I haven't been to an establishment for years because I don't enjoy myself there, and that's ok (too loud, too much stuff going on).
  • Considering my job (very public) people think I'm stuck up because they don't see me out and about in general...but I'm not. I just don't enjoy it and it's stressful.
  • I don't own a TV and keep my house quiet with the exception of occasional peaceful music.

Like I said, I don't need to be *around* other people like me. It would just be nice to know that there are some people like me, somewhere. It's hard not seeing oneself reflected in any way in the larger community. Does any of this sound like any of you? I'm not looking for personal messages or anything. Just a "yeah, me too" would be enough. 

Thanks

Parents
  • over 1 year ago

    I relate to a lot of what you say.

    I'm not unfriendly but I'm not social. Being social makes me so anxious.

    Don't wear heels either, no makeup, like you said - why suffer hell?

  • over 1 year ago in reply to Deleted user

    I'm with ya! I've had plenty of therapy and I understand that it's not healthy to avoid *all* social interactions "just" because I don't like them.

    But at some point I realized that it actually is ok for people like me to simply limit them as much as they want. Why force it? There are plenty of things I don't do because I don't like to. I don't have to fit the extrovert/social mold and that's totally ok!!

    I often think of that meme that goes something like "Just once I'd like to see this--'Talkative? Always want to go out and be with people? Try being quiet and introverted for a while...'" Or something like that lol!

Reply
  • over 1 year ago in reply to Deleted user

    I'm with ya! I've had plenty of therapy and I understand that it's not healthy to avoid *all* social interactions "just" because I don't like them.

    But at some point I realized that it actually is ok for people like me to simply limit them as much as they want. Why force it? There are plenty of things I don't do because I don't like to. I don't have to fit the extrovert/social mold and that's totally ok!!

    I often think of that meme that goes something like "Just once I'd like to see this--'Talkative? Always want to go out and be with people? Try being quiet and introverted for a while...'" Or something like that lol!

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