Could I be autistic?

Hi

I just wanted to get some views/advice, as I think I could possibly be autistic and am considering getting tested.

I am a 43 year old female.  I have struggled interacting with people all my life at school, work and anywhere else.  I have had very few friends and never had a relationship, but also never been bothered about this, preferring to do things alone or with my mum, however, at the same time I have always wished I was “normal” and have felt very lonely since my mum died almost 2 years ago.  I wish I could meet a person/people like myself, but have always felt and been treated like an oddity.  I know I can come across as rude/uninterested/unhelpful because of my quietness and people don’t have much confidence in me and get frustrated by me because of how I am.

I have rarely felt happy and have had a great deal of anxiety about everything for as long as I can remember, which has hampered my life a great deal and meant I have not achieved a lot of the things I should have done.

I also have other autistic traits such as having to arrange things perfectly, being ultra fussy about things, like having a routine, getting overwhelmed by a log of noise/activity/multiple conversations going on at once etc.

I always believed I was just shy/anxious/a natural loner/had social anxiety, but I am now starting to wonder whether it could be something like autism.  It is not something that was really picked up on when I was at school, which I believe was the case for many people who have been diagnosed as adults and I am therefore considering getting tested now.  I think what I am really wanting is to make sense of why I am how I am and whether autism could be the cause.

Does it sound like I could be autistic based on what I have said?  Obviously I realise there would be a great deal more to the testing but I would be interested in any initial advice/opinions.

Thanks for reading

x