Published on 12, July, 2020
I'm out off work with significant colonic disease. I had an endoscopy and they found problems in my stomach that explains why I keep vomiting every day.
I''m living at my mother's house, but she wants me out.
I phoned CAB and they said they can't help me unless my case is special regarding housing.
I visited CAB by appointment a few years ago about a different issue and tried to explain my issues. Afterwards, when I say bye and walked away, she called me a 'f**king idiot' under her breath. She didn't know I was undiagnosed.
It put me offf getting help.
My dream is to just live alone and have a garden, but that obviously isn't going to happen.
I wish I could find a way to do this.
I can't socialise and I can't take loud noises.
I'd suggest that you deal with the digestive health problems as quickly and effectively as you can as a matter of priority.
DO your OWN research (even though they tell you not to) as well as using medical professionals.
Some quite serious digestive issues can be addressed with altering your diet, by looking into it you might find you are one of the lucky ones and in order to get that nice solo life with a garden (which CAN be had at surprisingly low cost, if yo look into it) you will need to be fit and healthy to enjoy it, so fixing your own health is a priority.
Secondly, because as you've correctly identified, your situation is not yet such that you can walk into that nice life, you need to apply a temporary fix to your current housing situation.
You need to fix your mum such that she is willing to give you more time to get your act together and heal your gut.
Try and talk to her with a preset agenda of finding out the reasons why she wants you to leave, get a list if you can, then after thinking it over see if you can fix any issues quickly, even if only temporarily, it'll help you buy some time..
I've really had to work the "housing problem" several times in my life, and I've found that there are a number of workable alternatives to government or council housing or low rent private.
I had a friend who couldn't get on with his parents so he literally built a nice warm shed and lived effectively in a micro house in their garden only coming in to wash and do basic functions. If you are 45 then your mum is getting on a bit, so there must be some things you could do voluntarily that would be of genuine help to her, when your own problems don't occupy your full attention. I've found that helping out effectively and cheerfully, is as good as folding money with a lot of people.
My advice to look at alternative housing solutions should complement, and not replace ians advice.
In my own case during a period of trouble with my partner I lived intermittenlty on a narrow boat for a couple of years (mostly just on the weekends, admittedly) and were I to require government subsided housing I'd talk a mate into buying a used one and renting to me for as much as housing benefit will pay. If you do the maths right his income after paying for the mooring will be around 3 K P.A. which is quite good ROI when compared to buying a house and letting it...
BUT in order to have time to research alternatives, I feel you have to fix and stabilise your existing situation, and your health as a priority, no matter what it takes..