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Feeling lonely, no idea how to meet people local

Jakey
over 1 year ago

I want to meet people as I'm minimally speaking and actually have little to no real life friends. The place I'm in gives opportunities which I do take, but I'm often ignored because I can't speak that well. I'm not sure how to go about meeting people in that case. I do have moderate to severe sensory issues, I can handle a busy restaurant on a good day, but on a bad day I'd rather die than be there. 

And I need something to distract me from various thoughts. I'm in my mid 20s if that's any help. 

Parents
  • over 1 year ago

     @Autistic Adults

    Hi NAS79388,

    I share your minimalist conversational description of yourself. I have struggled since childhood to be the "ice breaker" always responding to---but never the creator of.  I'm not a shy person, but feel uncomfortable being the focus of attention.    When under those circumstances I fumble over my thoughts and words sometimes responding inappropriately.  I also share your wish to meet people, but have had many negative experiences with that. I too have no real life friends.  I don't respond very well when in the company of nervous, excessively talkative people. I usually get overlooked or ignored if in the company of such types.  I'm an OAP so have experienced a lifetime of these sort of responses despite my contined efforts to become more "likeable".  I made a recent effort to volunteer my time with a local steam museum.  I come from an engineering background. This sort of situation sounded very suitable for me.  I did not fit the profile they were looking for. Only last week I discovered an ASD group who meet twice a week at my local library.  I will give it a try with my attendance in a fortnights time.  

    you are young, so my advice to you is try not to allow yourself to get discouraged despite negative experiences with social engagement. It is an ongoing uphill struggle not generally recognised by NT's. For me though, at my age I am tired of the struggle, and look upon my forthcomming ASD meeting as "my last hurrah" at age 78.  

  • over 1 year ago in reply to NAS86592

    I wish you lots of luck with the group, I really hope it works out for you. 

Reply Children
  • over 1 year ago in reply to Queer Autistic Grunge
    Queer Autistic Grunge said:
    I wish you lots of luck with the group, I really hope it works out for you. 

    Sorry for the delayed response. Please don't think of me as rude. i have a focus issue and am easily distracted. I thank you and all others who lend their support. I'm not tied to my screen on a daily basis, and visit this site occasionally. I understand the dependancy of others to this great site, and their possible daily attachment to it. All I can add is that my mind has its limitation over what it can absorb in direct correlation to what my bum can endure sitting for any length of time.  :-)