Published on 12, July, 2020
because of the arguments, why not hibernate?
I have done this before.
You can change your name to 'hibernating'.
It's good psychologically because it stops me from posting and indicates to others that you are having a break.
Also, you can choose to still PM (which I do) which isolates you less.
Roy has chosen to do this yesterday.
I've been told by one person that someone they knew was thinking of joining but didn't because of the disagreements, others post far less, others join and then stay a short while.
I was sad to read Billy87 s post today.
To the new people here: it's not always like this and only certain subjects are incendiary so if you can manage to avoid reading them, that would help.
I am guilty of having joined into arguments because I also feel passionately about certain subjects and I expect I will occasionally still make my point.
However, I think restraint here is the key and personal insults should never be acceptable.
I dearly hope that this thread doesn't go the same way as my 'arguments' thread and become one almightly row ...
Today I'm considering whether to leave the forum.
When I was 1st diagnosed late in life (60) a year and a few months ago, this forum was a Godsend.
A really important place where I could learn and be supported and equally, give support to others.
At its best it's superb.
However, I do personally have difficulty when threads are made that offend me and I know others do too.
It isn't so simple as just not responding when these things act as a trigger for past traumas and fights you've had.
I've had quite a few fights in my life that have been long and hard and inequality bothers me - a lot.
There have been various threads and postings that simply do offend - including one with views pertaining to women set in aspic.
I do think that more could be done here with moderation, including an LGBTQ+ section as those types of threads have ended up locked due to conflict and also another section, as I suggested before, where other controversial ones could sit and people could try to avoid them.
Hopefully then those boundaries could be respected by others.
If I go, I just want to say a huge thanks to those friends I've made and for the huge fun that's been had here.
Also, if I do, I will post here to say and if people would like my private email address, I'll supply by PM.
I miss those that have already left - a lot
I hope everyone has a good, trauma free Sunday
I hope you follow your own advice and decide to hibernate rather than leave. You will be missed if you leave.
A few days or weeks in the hedgehog house sounds perfect. At least it will be a less prickly environment than here!
I hope you'll stay Debbie. You've created a lot of great - and I think important- threads here, that many have participated in.
I think the forum would be poorer without you.
The arguing and hostility going on here at the moment is typical of internet interaction. It's culture wars, basically - I don't think I've seen anything yet that doesn't fall under that umbrella.
There are so many really pressing issues in society and the world that we could be thinking about, that affect us all, instead of having entrenched battles over ideology...
However, I've also seen that things move along quickly here, so hopefully the forum won't stay like this for long.
I won't be leaving, although I might be getting my sketchbook out.. x
Hi Debbie, I know I’m being selfish. I personally would really miss you. I do fully get how the site can sometimes become. I then weigh it up and think of how much positiveness I have seen here as well. A lot of us carry scars from our younger lives, they do always stay with us. I tend not to get involved in triggering threads, hibernating seems to help me. I hope you are happy in whatever you decide but would love to see you stay.
Debbie, I appreciate that nobody can force you to stay here, and I do take on board what you have stated. However, I would feel sad if you were to leave. I know many others would too.
I am in agreement that the creation of additional forums is needed. As things stand, what one member may consider to be a healthy debate, can be an almighty trigger for another member and cause them to feel distressed.
If I think back to last year, public disagreements between members seemed to be considerably less frequent than they have been this year. I live in hope that this community can get back to how it used to be because it was (in my opinion) mostly fantastic.