Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello!
im new and I just want some advice. As much as you can give me. My partner has autism (still awaiting diagnosis- we’ve gonna have to save up for it private) and I just always feel like I’m not doing things right. I’ve spent hours researching and googling on how to be the best partner but I still feel like I get it wrong.
I know that they don’t always mean what they say to me but sometimes their joke can be really hurtful and I never say anything as I’m worried they’ll shut down or worse leave me.
I love my partner dearly and I just want to be the best partner I can be for them!
Thanks in advance!
NAS87458 said:I never say anything as I’m worried they’ll shut down or worse leave me.
That’s possibly the worst possible approach to take. I shouldn’t be judgemental if I were you especially as by your own acknowledgement they didn’t intend to hurt your feelings. Also don’t immediately dump a load of demands on them to mind read what will and won’t offend you. However if you don’t give them feedback about the things that do upset you then they will never improve in terms of treating you more sensitively. And while it’s true that they will probably never be as sensitive as a non-autistic person there probably is scope for improvement if you voice your concerns in a nonjudgemental way.