Published on 12, July, 2020
I've come to the conclusion that, no matter how hard I try to make something of myself in this world or no matter how hard I try to lead a simple and normal life, I will always fail. The system is designed against us and to keep us from any sense of belonging in this world, so I just don't care anymore.
I keep applying for jobs and attending interviews, but I keep failing them. I keep being told about "opportunities" for career blah blah blah etc, but I honest think it is all a lie to keep us running around in circles and to drive us insane. I'll never be able to get a job I'll be happy with because the system is designed to keep me from having any level of satisfaction in my life.
There is no chance for the autistic, we are un desirables, and because I am both autistic and gay I will be more of an undesirable than most people. I just don't think there is any point in trying to do anything anymore. Applying for work, seeking opportunities, attempting to find any sort of place in this world, there is just no point anymore.
I give up.
I don't think the system is deliberately designed to keep us from belonging or getting a job, it's just a side-effect of thinking and acting very differently to the people it is designed for.
It is hard to get a job. I have had long periods of unemployment and had to give up on my chosen career of librarianship because I did badly at the jobs I had and then really struggled with interviews trying to get a new one. I only got my current job (not librarianship, a very lowly office admin job) because I knew my boss from my place of worship, so there was no interview. I still mess stuff up at work a lot.
What skills do you have? Have you got any that can be used in self-employed work from home work? I think we tend to do better with those kinds of jobs. I am trying to set myself up as a freelance proofreader and copy-editor, but even that is not easy.