What advice would you give to your younger self?

I would say 'you're autistic! That's why you feel lost and alone, look after yourself and don't let people hurt you '. I didn't know I was till much much later in life.

Yes be careful who you make friends with.

Oh goodness that has made me feel sad. I wish I could've heard that back then.

Leave the house.  Easier said than done though!

Alienatedhuman said:

it’s a good topic I like this thread! 

Good.

When I created it I hadn't expected many replies, and only from older members, but of course, no matter what age you are, there always the opportunity to look back with regret/whatever emotion.

Great advice! Actually my inner voice told me that few times in the past

I often still need to give myself this advice now too!

"What would you wish on your deathbed?"

By that, I mean on your deathbed would you wish that you'd stayed in more, or would you wish that you'd done that thing?

My sensory/social problems are only there in the moment. They are not what I remember. I am not as good at this as I used to be, but I can still force myself to do something that I also know will give me issues (e.g. go to see a band.)

I even have it this very weekend, because my nephews are coming to stay and we will be going into London and Harrod's at their request. I am dreading it with my very being. I love those guys, but they are always squabbling and one leap short of an injury. I find their visits really stressful and this on top of a London trip with trains, and busy weekend shopping is making me sweat just to type. However, I know afterwards, I'll miss them and be glad that I did it.

They don’t matter, you’re not less. They can’t experience the world in Technicolor.

It’s hard to say, because I remember getting mad if someone told me something nice or just positive about me. So if I said to my younger self “you are beautiful and special the way you are” my younger self would have probably get mad and started crying or acted out calling me a liar. I figured out long time ago, that I’m different and that I don’t have to be like others, I just wanted to be accepted. Maybe the best thing to say would be: “you will be happier in the future, you are not failure, looser or stupid. It’s not your fault. You have a condition that makes you the way you are” 

it’s a good topic I like this thread! 

"It's ok to be quiet".

Just bumping.

Regret is what you didn't do. Not what you did.

I would say "live for yourself, not others". I've spent too much time trying to please people rather than living the way I want to. 

"A parent can be a monster and wish to hurt you, even it it's a parent. Your father is lying to you. Get the medical documents and have your thyroid tested NOW. Mother is just enabling your father, she would be happy to kill you to please him, do no trust her. She lied to the authorities to protect him, it's not the cops fault if the case was not taken to the court. Get your medical issues sorted, then pick up and LEAVE. Join the Navy, go to that German place, whatever, just leave. Your parents are monsters."

"BTW, buy Bitcoin now and sell them when they reach 20K. It's worth the wait."

If I could say anything to myself I would say don't give up, things do get better - and always be yourself.

Humans are social animals. Even Autistic humans are meant to be social I think. We need the same reassurance from other humans that Allistic people need. But often we do not get it.

We see more negatives than positives in ourselves unfortunately.

I still do I think. It's hard to retain to a positive view of yourself when you are socially isolated.

Yes it's a constant battle to try and keep a positive view of yourself and life.

I still do I think. It's hard to retain to a positive view of yourself when you are socially isolated.

Gold, In elemental and cat form, for the win..

It depends on how you spend the time whilst waiting...

'It's not you'

Although I wouldn't have believed it, I had an extremely negative view of myself.

"Don't be a people pleaser" is darn good advice that I wish I'd had (or heeded) when I was younger.

Equally cats have taught me that doing stuff I would very much rather not do now, can give collosal rewards, so as with many things this all gets a bit nuanced.

"Pleasing people" by making them happy in some way or helping them achieve stuff they previously could not without unexpected help is very much worth doing sometimes and an absolute waste of time with others.

I got fed up with being sick of other people and decided to find ways of enjoying them more. Finding nice  ways to be pleased by people is very empowering (and a bit enslaving) at the same time.