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Support for my Male NT Partner

NAS86624
over 1 year ago

Hi,

First time posting. I am female, currently undergoing the diagnostic process - I actually had my formal assessment today.

My partner is struggling with the difficulties I face overall, and now that I'm faced with this new information, in particular. 

I am looking for a place he can find support specifically for NT men with female partners with ASD.

All forums and groups seem to be focused on supporting NT women in relationships with ASD men (probably because of the historical prevelance of ASD in men vs females), but he feels like he needs to connect with other men since, let's face it, there are differences between how people of different genders and gender identities experience the world.

Any recommendations?

Thanks Slight smile

  • over 1 year ago

    Hi , in addition to the replies you've had, I would recommend you have a look at our page on Relationships: https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/topics/family-life-and-relationships/family-life/partners.

    You may be able to find support groups for your partner on our Autism Services Directory: https://www.autism.org.uk/directory.

    Best wishes,

    Anna Mod

  • over 1 year ago in reply to NAS86624

    Sounds like you've got a gooden there.

  • over 1 year ago

    Hi 

    Thanks for the reply. Yes, I am going through a very difficult time at this point and am seeing a therapist once a week and taking a lot of time for myself. It's why I'm wanting to know if there is support for my partner because while I am drowning, he is right there beside me trying to put my life vest on while staying afloat himself.

    I don't want to get to the end of this process and have him completely burnt out and our relationship along with him.

    I don't expect to come through this unscathed, but I want to do as much damage control as possible. 

    Also, he is very special to me and I can't imagine what this must be like for him. He says often "I'm learning too, just like you." I just want him to have somewhere to go wherr he can vent a bit and say the things he can't say to me.

  • over 1 year ago

    I recommend, specially in such stressful time for you with the assessment and the new information that you have about yourself, that you priorities yourself for a while. I don't know your story, but this new knowledge about the self can be life transformative. When I realised my own autism I started to view my childhood, past relationships and all my life in a new light. It's a lot for some people. I hope it's easier for you, but if not then it's ok to care mainly about yourself for sometime.