Published on 12, July, 2020
Are autistic people known for being wild in bed and actively sought out by NTs? I saw a post on reddit where an NT said they did that and implied that it's common knowledge that some NTs do that because autistic people have that reputation. Anyone know?
For the record I wish this were true. If collectively as autistic people we can spread the roumer that autistic people are incredible in bed we should totally do this.
I would cancel my assessment appointment if this became a commonly held belief. I have enough trouble as it is trying to convince people I'm asexual and not interested.
One man’s pain is another’s pleasure they say.
I think my point was less about BDSM and more about how an age gap is viewed as predatory even when there are very good reasons for it. I am no expert in the gay scene but I gather clubbing and hooking up is largely a younger gay man thing? So if you were trying to do that just by virtue of the kind of people who'd be there you'd be approaching much younger men. Maybe the gay scene is more tolerant but I'm fairly sure if you did that in a heterosexual context before long there would be a bunch of people declaring you a predator and demanding you be canceled / banned etc. And whether anything came of that would depend a lot on whether those who disliked you knew the right people.
You don't need to walk around in a gimp suit cracking a whip to be labeled a predator. Just be the wrong side of 30, autistic and hanging out with people in the early 20s, uni students etc.
I can honestly say that I’ve never personally been into the whole BDSM leather/fetish thing on the gay scene myself, but I do (somewhat) understand why some are into it and even the “satanic thing” amongst gay men, even if a handsome and muscular young gay man in leather or rubber/PVC, etc does look good - frankly in some ways, I find it a little disturbing that because of past trauma affecting a person’s self-esteem that they feel the need to want to be punished and/or to experience pain as a form of “pleasure” and/or as the only way to express love with another person, neither does this love need to be expressed via sexual activity, that some people seem to almost be obsessed with in our modern culture since my teens in the 1980’s - perhaps I’m trying to “keep it classy” here and still hanker after the classically romantic version of love and romance, something that is timeless, going home to Ireland so often in the hopes of meeting my “handsome Irish hunk” without the need to “jump each others bones” at every waking moment - I’d been involved in the gay scene for many years and avidly read articles in the gay press in Ireland after I’d come out in Catholic Rural Ireland after coming onto the Dublin gay scene, plus I’d always been around straight women and girls for most of my life and was never really into “manly” things so straight girls formed many of my cultural values, including after I came out as gay - and being the most romantic sign of the Zodiac (Libra) was a factor too
IrishInManchesterUK said:now 52, my rich handsome Prince might very well be 25, despite having more in common with someone over 40
See this is the thing. A lot of autistic people just don't get the same life experiences as other people our age. And if your autistic special interests are widely seen as juvenile (anime, video games etc) there is a decent chance one day you'll end up in a social circle thats younger than you, maybe much younger.
And its at that point people will start treating you as if you are some sort of creep or predator. How dare you hope to find a romantic partner who shares your interests and that you can relate to you monster. You are clearly trying to corrupt these young adults who have had more sex than you and more jobs than you and a lot of them seem to have more money than you ... How dare you.
People just assume older adults hanging out socially with young adults are some kind of threat. It's just another unfair stigma that gets thrown at a lot of autistic people.