Published on 12, July, 2020
Are autistic people known for being wild in bed and actively sought out by NTs? I saw a post on reddit where an NT said they did that and implied that it's common knowledge that some NTs do that because autistic people have that reputation. Anyone know?
For the record I wish this were true. If collectively as autistic people we can spread the roumer that autistic people are incredible in bed we should totally do this.
I would cancel my assessment appointment if this became a commonly held belief. I have enough trouble as it is trying to convince people I'm asexual and not interested.
Not being diagnosed doesn't make an autistic person become neurotypical, and the people that hunt for autists already know what to look for. My ex narcissistic girlfriend knew I was autistic before I did, and in retrospect, she used it to manipulate and abuse me. From the unsolicited stories she gossiped about her ex, I'm guessing he was autistic too. I'm still suffering the consequences of that relationship.
Her role model is her big sister who married an autistic guy, and that poor guy is so miserable. Everyone knows he is being abused just by looking at him. He's so scared and selfless. It's like he's not even present because he has checked out. The stories I've heard about that relationship belong in a psychology textbook. It's really sad and concerning that people like her exist free in the community. It's like meeting a person that seems nice and later find out that they are a dangerous cartel/mafia. Scary. Anyway, there are definitely predators out there that consciously hunt for and groom autistic people for their own personal gain at the cost to the victim. We are vulnerable to manipulation, and Cluster B personalities are experts at it.
I think that cancelling the assessment won't be the most helpful for your concern and your overall well-being. Still, I can understand your concern and believe it is quite valid. Maybe if you were assessed, you could find a service that would help you with that so you won't have to deal with it as much.
If you're in the US, you can get a diagnosis by seeing a private evaluator out of pocket. Mine was $900, but I'm sure you can shop around and find something cheaper. Insurance won't know, yet you will receive a full report and know for yourself. With that report, you could access services through non-profit organizations that will have nothing to do with your insurance.
You could also reach out to said non-profits and ask them if they are aware of insurance reducing access to care because of autism diagnosis.
On the other hand, if you do receive a diagnosis and at some point fill out healthcare or insurance paperwork that specifically asks about autism and you decline to report the diagnosis, you might be committing fraud.
The whole system is a racket.
I'm transitioning which is helping. I'm currently having about a 50% success rate at passing as a teenage boy and the increase in respect and decrease in harassment even when I'm simply walking down the street is incredible. I'm hoping that being assessed as autistic won't negatively affect my ability to access care (as it does in parts of the US).