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Autism obsession with a person

JuB65

Hi, I haven’t been diagnosed but my son has Aspergers as do other members of my family and I’m pretty sure I have too (I’m currently going through the assessment process). I’m 57 and female. I’ve been happily married for 25 years, have 3 children and was totally in love with my husband. I was obsessed with him from the moment I met him and haven’t looked at another man since and was convinced we’d be together till the day I died. All well and good until he left me last summer and I really have fallen to pieces. The last 9 months have really convinced me that I have Aspergers because of the way I’ve reacted as well as looking back to my childhood and teenage years and the way I’ve always been. Anyway I’m now convinced that he is my Asperger’s obsession. I’ve been seeing a therapist to help me and today she’s told me that she can’t do anything more for me because I’m so obsessed with him and am utterly convinced I’ll never find another man attractive and will never feel the same again so I’ll either end up single, lonely and unhappy or with someone I’m not happy with and unhappy. I’m absolutely refusing to be open to any other possibilities because I know he’s the love of my life and the only person for me. It’s awful. Anyway, I’m wondering if anyone else has experienced this or something similar and if there is anything I can do, or anyone I can talk to or see to help?

Parents

  • obsession with a person and having one special person is a listed BPD trait. 
    its not on the asd list, but it is bpd.

  • in reply to Caelus

    Interesting, I’ve looked up BPD and have none of the symptoms of that. Autism yes, but not BPD. It’s funny it’s not listed with ASD as I’ve found loads of examples of people with Aspergers/ASD online saying that a person becomes their obsession and it makes it really difficult to get over an ex. I also found a therapists website that said women with ASD often don’t obsess over things like me do, it’s more subjects or people and they can make great researchers as a result.

  • in reply to JuB65

    ah, i think what probably clashes with it to put the diagnoses off adding it to asd is that they see it perhaps clashing with asd having no relationships and not being social enough to build a relationship. they perhaps see a clash with that.

    but it can make sense if they think. if they kinda think how a person who has had trouble with relationships and being lonely would cling onto anyone that ever actually gets close to them. so it makes sense.

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  • in reply to JuB65

    ah, i think what probably clashes with it to put the diagnoses off adding it to asd is that they see it perhaps clashing with asd having no relationships and not being social enough to build a relationship. they perhaps see a clash with that.

    but it can make sense if they think. if they kinda think how a person who has had trouble with relationships and being lonely would cling onto anyone that ever actually gets close to them. so it makes sense.

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