Published on 12, July, 2020
I have came out to 4 people in my life about my autism so far. I have considered all of them as caring empathetic people. 2 of them were very nice, offering to listen to me since it's a lot of things in mind and lot of feelings. The other two had a reaction that surprised me. One said nothing but "thank you for sharing" and right after that asked me for a favor. It felt like this big reveal of mine ment nothing to them. The other one asked me "is it officially diagnosed?" And didn't respond to my answer only a day after writing a message "do you want to hang out?". I'm sad because of these reactions and I honestly don't know how to interpret them.. it felt like they don't care or understand how huge of a deal this is for me.. did anyone have similar experiences?
To me it honestly feels like a disappointment. I thought that they cared much more. I expected more compassion or care. I expected some sort of support or a listening ear. Or maybe a genuine gratitude that I'm sharing my vulnerable self with them.. I feel like I've lost two friends or like I'm too naive to think that they were caring in the first place.. and I also feel like maybe their reaction has been ok and normal but I'm expecting too much of people.. I am not sure what to think of their reactions. I know that it felt so bad. I'm avoiding them recently. I'm disappointed in our friendship all together and I'm not so excited to see them again..