Learning to drive is overwhelming

Hello,

I recently got my license (on my 3rd test attempt) and I'm starting to realise how overwhelming I find driving to be.

Sometimes I enjoy it - it feels good to be good at things - but other times, especially driving home after work or a late night event where I've been masking for hours, it's incredibly stressful. I usually cry on the drive home because everything is so overwhelming and I can't stop without stopping the car, but even then I wouldn't be in a suitable place to calm myself or feel better. Not until I get home.

I think this is a result of:

A. Being worried about how other people perceive me on the road

B. My overworked brain having to process the constant information about the road ahead and around me

C. Not being able to easily 'let go' of small mistakes I make

D. All of these things together distracting my thoughts! Making me worry I'm going to crash

I am still yet to start frequently driving home alone (one of my parents has been coming with me each time). So my experience driving could either get better or worse as I get more independent - I'm willing to find out! But driving is starting to become something I dread. I guess I really would just love to know that I'm not alone, it's hard not to feel isolated in my experiences a lot of the time.

I also feel like people who tell me "it'll get better with time." aren't understanding the complexity of my experience.

Thank you to anyone who reads this and/or shares their experience, it makes me feel less alone as an autistic person in a NT world

Parents
  • Yes. I got a third-attempt pass too. On the first two attempts I got flustered too easily, but on the third attempt I was lucky in finding a sympathetic instructor. Perhaps he recognised my condition even though I didn't understand it at the time.

    I'm quite an experienced driver now but I still get stressed from my indignation at other drivers' aggressiveness and carelessness (not that my driving is perfect). Also, as with you, there's sometimes too much information to process and I make a wrong turn. When that happens I remind myself that I'm different and there's nothing I can do about it. Sometimes I practise a route at a quiet time to prepare for when I need to do it for real. 

    It may never be easy for you but experience will help.

Reply
  • Yes. I got a third-attempt pass too. On the first two attempts I got flustered too easily, but on the third attempt I was lucky in finding a sympathetic instructor. Perhaps he recognised my condition even though I didn't understand it at the time.

    I'm quite an experienced driver now but I still get stressed from my indignation at other drivers' aggressiveness and carelessness (not that my driving is perfect). Also, as with you, there's sometimes too much information to process and I make a wrong turn. When that happens I remind myself that I'm different and there's nothing I can do about it. Sometimes I practise a route at a quiet time to prepare for when I need to do it for real. 

    It may never be easy for you but experience will help.

Children
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