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What's gender?

Deleted user

A discussion in this forum made me ask myself this question, what's gender?. I googled it but what I found there didn't make much sense to me. I always thought that the gender of the other person doesn't tell me much about who they are. It just informs me about the appropriate pronouns that this person wants me to use with them. Frankly I don't care about figuring out my gender. I was born in a woman's body and I never felt like it's the wrong one. I think I'd feel the same if I was born in a man's body. I have never spent time thinking about this part of myself because I never thought that it's important enough to me. I'll be the same person anyway, no? I don't think it would change much about who I am... Can anyone share how they understand gender?

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  • I haven't read any of the replies, so I apologize in advance if I offend anyone

    Pronouns are DANGEROUS

    And I am not saying they are bad because it helps transgender people feel included. But what people don't understand, is that TRUE, REAL transgender people represent 0. 1% of the population. Will we reveal our private feelings about ourselves only for less than 5% of the population? 

    Woke people claim they are forwarding diversity, but let me get this straight, your "friend" has asserted that you HAVE to use pronouns? Where in the world does that include how YOUR freedom to reveal YOUR private life? I don't know how you feel about yourself, but there is ABSOLUTELY NO OBLIGATION for you to use pronouns. NONE. And if people say you are being discriminatory then it just proves the point that they are guilt-tripping you to accept THEIR view through HARCEMENT and INSULTS.

    So much for "diversity" right

  • in reply to Kittera

    Are you trying to say that when someone has to reveal their pronoun or use one then they are sort of "forced" to come out or share a personal info that they might not want to share? . I'm trying to understand your view here.

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  • in reply to HP35

    I know I was not replying to any comment but... I am confused, what are you talking about?

  • in reply to Kittera

    Lots of people say "all pronouns welcome." You can do that if you don't want to express a preference. People just want to know a way of addressing you that you're happy with. It's like asking your name rather than just guessing a name and calling you that.

    Detransitioning isn't any harder than transitioning in the first place, medically speaking. Relatively few people do it, but it's certainly not "over" if you decide you've made a mistake.

    I went through similar feelings as you before I came out as non binary trans. I hated being asked for pronouns because I hated giving she/her but hadn't given myself permission to use anything else yet.

    It's ok to be trans and feel uncertain. It's okay to have imposter syndrome because you worry you're not a "real, true" trans person. The community won't reject you. Not all of us have known since we were 3. It's okay to spend some time exploring your gender. The community won't reject you, and won't force you into choosing a label while you're still questioning.

    Good luck.

  • in reply to Deleted user

    Ok, I will only reply to this one comment because it's your question. After this I'll disappear because as you can see and as I could predict when I started writing this, I got back-clash. (Hater is definitely not the right term for this... argument? Contradiction, conversation that's a good word) *Laugh

    Anyway, yes, that's my argument that now you MUST present your gender with your name. I mean... it's none of their business? I can definitely understand why people should present themselves differently if they WANT to. But what I got a lot of argument for, is that I claim that people are forcing others to add pronouns to their identity. I mean your friend "forcing" you confused your identity, didn't it?

    You shouldn't have to use pronouns if you don't want to use pronouns. Nobody should FORCE you to use pronouns and then claim that they accept diversity. It's your right to say no. It's my right to say no and it's other's right right to say yes. That is diversity.

    And note: Transgender are people who thoroughly and LONGELY know that they are another gender. If you change gender, let's say you have a surgical change and everything. And then later realise you were wrong (maybe you were just going through hard times) It's over. It's too late to turn back. THAT'S the reason changing gender has been LEGALLY so long to change, that's why they go through paperwork, medical professional. It's not a haircut or another pair of socks. It's your life. That's what I meant by real not confused people, not impostors (keep up to date please), not children, but people who know. They know.

    And it's not just the presentation of your identity, you have to understand that it's security behind it. We are not living in a world of all flowers and bubblegum. People have and will continue to take advantage for horrible reasons. Pronouns will also change other things. And other things are not in favour of the female sex. Not. At. All. That is why I am against pronouns. It's the domino change behind it. I could go on, send links or send proof but let's just stop there.

    And I apologise again if I offend anyone. But I won't reply to any comment, let's be civil about this.