Trans and autistic?

Not on any new hormones, but very much relate to being angry about being repressed for so long. If a parent would say "we don't care if it's a boy or a girl as long as it's healthy and happy" then they don't get to put terms and conditions on that now or in that kid's future. So the anger is very much a grief stage from being lied to, told you are loved unconditionally but then finding out that isn't actually the case, because then you lose people you thought you knew, and they've been replaced by hypocrites who failed the responsibility they placed upon themselves of accepting you "whichever way you turn out".

Don't worry it gets better tho.

That’s true - it’s so often said to express the wish for a healthy child. But what suddenly jumps out at me about that phrase is the ‘IT’ which already unconsciously embeds the bias. ‘We don’t care just as long as THEY [-the born child-] are healthy’ would be more authentically embracing of all possibilities, of all possible *realities*.

No ‘lol’ can ever threaten your reality, though of course you’d have to be made of stone not to feel some hurt when someone who understands what being denied and misunderstood feels like chooses to other you in that way. It’s a way of acting out ‘see how I feel?’ But very much administered to the wrong target. 

That’s true - it’s so often said to express the wish for a healthy child. But what suddenly jumps out at me about that phrase is the ‘IT’ which already unconsciously embeds the bias. ‘We don’t care just as long as THEY [-the born child-] are healthy’ would be more authentically embracing of all possibilities, of all possible *realities*.

No ‘lol’ can ever threaten your reality, though of course you’d have to be made of stone not to feel some hurt when someone who understands what being denied and misunderstood feels like chooses to other you in that way. It’s a way of acting out ‘see how I feel?’ But very much administered to the wrong target. 

I was talking to Shardovan about something I already said before you arrived. It's not about you.

this is where all your pronoun things can get confusing because i think your both refering to the last "it" on my message your replying to as if thats a pronoun when i didnt use it as a pronoun lol

Oh I knew you were citing it exactly as it’s said for authenticity, don’t worry. Although not a parent I’ve used the phrase myself: ‘I’m sure as long as it’s healthy you’ll be… etc’ It just made me think, seeing the expression in writing 

Hi Shard you made a good point there and I just want to clarify my own in regard to that in order to spare any misunderstanding: I would have put "they" as it is usually my gender neutral default anyway, but as it is a quote I wanted to retain the authenticity of the phrase exactly as I heard it. Though I do find "it"(pertaining to people) to be dehumanising myself ofc I still respect the validity of those who actively choose it/it's pronouns too.