Unconditional Love

I had never believed that this existed until very recently. As a child I had to earn love by “good behaviour” and doing well at school. In my marriage it was clear that “love” was again earnt but this time for sex. Friends were little better as always there were value systems imposed on me and limits to what they would give. 

My involvement with Christianity was always defective and ultimately abusive (them on me) with the entire premis of their belief system based on judgement. They threw about the mantra “god is love” but it is a complete lie as god only loves you if you agree with his rules, if you don’t off to hell you jolly well go!  Needless to say I have no connection with religion at all now  

Id given up on ever finding real love, unconditional love, but to my surprise and delight I have, she is my partner Hazel …

We met while volunteering at Cats Protection, gradually grew closer and have now been in a complete relationship for over six months. Her love, unlike everyone else I’ve ever known, truly is unconditional. She never judges me, she never makes me earn love, she can hold an alternative perspective or opinion without imposing it on me and her reactions to my autism are perfect. I get fairly frequent meltdowns and often when we are out and about, her response is always supportive and kind and understanding. She’s not an autistic herself but somehow knows intuitively what to do for the best with me. 

Thank you Hazel, I adore you with my every atom xxx

Emma

Parents
  • Congrats Emma, what a lovely post to read.

    Interesting you note 'she isn't autistic herself but knows intuitively...' and I think that's amazing. That is the ideal scenario. I guess this is what real empathy is, not just sympathising with an issue but really accommodating it through action/support.

    I feel fortunate to also share some of this in my partner. Being only 6 months in to diagnosis it is a process still developing, it is a journey of unmasking/discovery for both myself and my partner, and I'm aware there are no guarantees in that. It's a tough journey for all involved.

    But I think what your situation displays well is how, in starting in a new relationship, you have been excepted as yourself right away. This again is great to read, it gives me faith in my fellow humans that we might really see each other for who we are, not the label we carry.

    Enjoy it. Also, pay it forward where you can, we need more of this sort of love in the world

  • Thanks JT, I’ve always tried to be kind to everyone and will definitely pay forward best as I can. I wish everyone had a Hazel, then there’d be no hurt, no abuse, no cruelty, she is amazing 

Reply Children
No Data