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“Everyone is on the spectrum somewhere” Needs to stop being said!

Mcguire-NAS85390

I can’t be the only Neurodiverse person who can’t stand it when neurotypical people say, “We’re all on the spectrum somewhere. No one is normal. We are all unique and different in our own way.”

Yeah! sure, I understand the concept but as much as this is true, to suggest that everyone can be equally categorized as neurologically different and unique like those who are on the spectrum is offensive, ignorantly incorrect, and completely disregards the struggle a Neurodiverse person (like myself) has to endure as we try to comprehend, comply and navigate ourselves through society’s dysfunctional norms just to get to the end of a day successfully (whatever successfully means). I wish I were normal. For me, because of how i’m treated, it’s not a privilege to be diverse. There’s no equality in being this way in society. Non at all. For example I kept my Autism a secret throughout my entire working life up until I lost my dream job because Im different. I was told that there was a pattern and the pattern was because of me. The pattern was that 3 independent colleges bullied me. After I was told that i had lost my employment, I finally got the courage to tell my employer that I have Autism. That’s why im different.

Now, they’re trying to tell me that I don’t have Austim and Im normal. Not only that but for the first time in my working career the word ‘overwhelmed’ is constantly being used to justify minor errors that are occurring do to a lack of information/instruction. and instead of giving me the opportunity to correct it like I was given before I told them I have autism… Now It’s just assumed that im overwhelmed and can’t handle the job. Gardening. I’m a Gardener. For my City. It’s not rocket science. And the more complex things are the more I thrive. So please Neurotypical people, Trust me! there is NO equality! 

And So No. Not “Everyone lands on the spectrum somewhere”, and this concept needs to stop being said. There is no such thing as more or less Autistic people. Either people have Autism and are on the spectrum or they are not. Period. The Spectrum is not a vertical measurement as in more or less/high or low, It’s horizontal as in there is only one equal level of Autism and the movement is left to right not up and down. The only difference is defined by the individuals personal autistic traits so an autistic person who is on the far left of the spectrum is equally as Autistic as someone who is on the far right the only difference is what they can and can not do. Some are verbals, some are not. Some can do math, some can not. Some understand facial expressions and social ques, some do not… ect.

Unique neurotypical personality traits,  expressed mannerisms and independent choices, decisions and responses is NOT the same kind of “different” as those who are different from have a Neurological condition like Autism.ADHD,Dyslexia,OCD, Asperger’s… It’s not even close.

Parents

  • Well said. I've come to understand that there is the vast neurotypical majority, then there is a short bridge/fuzzy interzone called 'on the spectrum' (or the beginnings of that), but to which no formal autistic diagnosis would ever be attached. And then there is the formal autistic spectrum, firmly on the other side of the bridge. I think a lot of people with one foot lightly on the bridge, and another hevily in 'NT land' habitually use this 'ah sure we're all.... I mean look at me...' type of phraseology and it (mostly accidentally) demeans and insults someone much more disabled by the NT environments that both are simultaneously experiencing when these sorts of exchanges occur. It is certainly frustrating, and can very much trigger imposter syndrome feelings or 'do they think I'm just trying to be special?' worries. All we can do is educate about the 'bridge' and see if the penny drops.

    For me, that concept can sometimes even be felt without it being overtly said, as I work in an environment (a library) that tends to attract more introverted and neurodiverse people to its workforce. So there are genuinely more instances of the 'on the bridge' factor than there might be in any other societal cross-section. And I imagine a couple of other people in my building who would get a diagnosis (or an adjacent one - eg. ADHD) if they sought one. So I do sometimes end up in this depressed state of 'well, they're a little 'odd' themselves and still have fuctioned much better in more demanding roles' etc. But in a way, that's what tells me all I need t know. They're swimming along mostly with ease in their 'oddness', not getting mired in exhaustion and overwhelm at the slightest blip in established routine. 

  • in reply to Shardovan

    I think also that anyone who's reached the point of 'I must know' has suffered more from their environment to the point of being ready to lose their mind if some reason isn't supplied. Whereas most of  the 'we're all...' crowd will likely never likely get to that place of 'I must know'. Because there's nothing *to* know - they really are 'just' on the fuzzy border and not debilitated in any remotely comparable way.  

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