Published on 12, July, 2020
It's not a low mood, or emotional anguish, it is literally just a resigned acceptance that everything happening is too much and there's only one course of action. Not an immediate need, just a it will happen when it does. I'm still doing things I enjoy. I've called it resigned acceptance, but really I don't know what this is. It's kinda like sitting in an armchair in a burning building and thinking "well at least it's warm."
I'm just thinking out loud, so to speak.
I know you have said it's not a low mood, depression (I think it is anyway) is a bit like this with me, it brings a calmness, an inner stillness, I think it makes you surrender, a complete contrast to the anxiety.
I live in a constant flux between the two and definitely prefer the 'being' of depression, I think I may even be at a point now where I welcome it's arrival.
And I think I finally understand the relationship between the two and what mixed anxiety and depression means, I've never really understood it until recently.