Friendships - how do you do it?

Morganna Le Faye said:

Do I just resign myself to a life without meaningful friendships?  Stop trying.

Only if that's what you want. However I would never advocate giving up hope - it sets you on a path to darkness that can be difficult to leave...

Morganna Le Faye said:

Do people with autism find it easier to befriend others on the spectrum?

My experience is that ND people tend to be more accepting of others' differences (not hard to understand why) which can very much facilitate relationships. Having said this, I think that balance is needed. For me, I have friends from all walks which I find gives me big picture perspective. Those who choose to isolate themselves against those who are different risk becoming prejudiced: colour, financial status, sexuality, neuro processing, other. And minorities are equally, if not more, able to judge others for being "normal" in the same way they feel they are being judged. Only socialising with like minded people doesn't help society as a whole (in my opinion).

Morganna Le Faye said:

What have others done?  Any suggestions?

My technique (learnt as a teen) is to have multiple friendship groups. I can show different parts of who I am to different people depending on who they are and what I need. Having multiple groups allows me to avoid feeling like I'm annoying people, and because I'm not secretive about it, if I disappear for a while, everyone thinks that I'm just hanging out with different friends. It makes it very easy to have meltdowns and lock myself away without facing questions. It can be lonely though, when no one notices that your not around. So, pros and cons just like everything else hehehe

My advice would be to experiment with what you want from relationships. You will shine in the situations that you feel comfortable in, so look for those. There are plenty of open, non judgemental people in the world, we just need to go out and find them.

Morganna Le Faye said:

Do I just resign myself to a life without meaningful friendships?  Stop trying.

Only if that's what you want. However I would never advocate giving up hope - it sets you on a path to darkness that can be difficult to leave...

Morganna Le Faye said:

Do people with autism find it easier to befriend others on the spectrum?

My experience is that ND people tend to be more accepting of others' differences (not hard to understand why) which can very much facilitate relationships. Having said this, I think that balance is needed. For me, I have friends from all walks which I find gives me big picture perspective. Those who choose to isolate themselves against those who are different risk becoming prejudiced: colour, financial status, sexuality, neuro processing, other. And minorities are equally, if not more, able to judge others for being "normal" in the same way they feel they are being judged. Only socialising with like minded people doesn't help society as a whole (in my opinion).

Morganna Le Faye said:

What have others done?  Any suggestions?

My technique (learnt as a teen) is to have multiple friendship groups. I can show different parts of who I am to different people depending on who they are and what I need. Having multiple groups allows me to avoid feeling like I'm annoying people, and because I'm not secretive about it, if I disappear for a while, everyone thinks that I'm just hanging out with different friends. It makes it very easy to have meltdowns and lock myself away without facing questions. It can be lonely though, when no one notices that your not around. So, pros and cons just like everything else hehehe

My advice would be to experiment with what you want from relationships. You will shine in the situations that you feel comfortable in, so look for those. There are plenty of open, non judgemental people in the world, we just need to go out and find them.