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Unmasking as a adult

Bearer1976
  1. I'm 46 and I have spent my life masking.

I have to mask when I'm out,at work but mostly when I'm at home with my family.  They either get stressed when i say something or jokingly put me down or they simply get stressed there self.

How do people handle it? As I just feel numb most of the time.

Parents

  • Hey Bearer1976. Sorry, I don`t feel able to provide answers to your question, as I am trying to figure stuff out for myself. I, too, have spent my life masking or at least attempting to mask (-the most effective way of me doing this has been to be a loner and if I`ve had my "differences" noticed then I have been seen to be weird/funny with people/not willing to participate in things or events....which none of which are the reality. I do wish to participate in things and be with people-sometimes!!-just don`t know how to do this without going through a huge amount of stress, anxiety and discomfort....this, inevitably, does not happen much). I have gone through life trying to ignore or not make a big deal out of how I am or how I act. I have, somehow, met somebody that I truly feel for and (-am sure this is probably an autistic trait-) I give myself to wholeheartedly and completely honestly and openly (-I am very much either or, black or white, with no real inbetweens). This now means that I have been unable to hide my differences and difficulties (-emotions, in particular, which before now I would easily detach from)

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  • Hey Bearer1976. Sorry, I don`t feel able to provide answers to your question, as I am trying to figure stuff out for myself. I, too, have spent my life masking or at least attempting to mask (-the most effective way of me doing this has been to be a loner and if I`ve had my "differences" noticed then I have been seen to be weird/funny with people/not willing to participate in things or events....which none of which are the reality. I do wish to participate in things and be with people-sometimes!!-just don`t know how to do this without going through a huge amount of stress, anxiety and discomfort....this, inevitably, does not happen much). I have gone through life trying to ignore or not make a big deal out of how I am or how I act. I have, somehow, met somebody that I truly feel for and (-am sure this is probably an autistic trait-) I give myself to wholeheartedly and completely honestly and openly (-I am very much either or, black or white, with no real inbetweens). This now means that I have been unable to hide my differences and difficulties (-emotions, in particular, which before now I would easily detach from)

Children
  • in reply to 🤔

    I am a all or nothing person, in any relationship. Even though to be like that comes natural to me, it's not always welcomed by poeple. As the person does some thing or says something to contradict that. 

    This can be any one. I find it hard to trust poeple because of that.

    Yes it is a autisic triat.