When work is challenging as an autistic

This is quite an emotive issue for me. I had what could be considered a relatively successful career but had to give it up prematurely, mainly because I could not cope with working in large open plan offices.

Homebird said:

I used to work in an office which wasn't too bad when I was in a small team.

At first mine wasn't too bad. I was in a small office with a maximum of 5 colleagues, who were not there a lot of the time anyway.

Homebird said:

Then came hot desking which became less comfortable as there was always the decision where to sit. I guess I masked the difficulty to a certain extent. Then we moved to a completely open plan building.

The businesses I worked for seemed to keep changing and reorganising things for no good reason. Every change proved harder for me to cope with. Every reorganisation seemed to involve moving to a larger, noisier open plan office. I moved jobs to try and get away from the huge open plan offices. Then a few months down the line there would be another reorganisation...

I began to struggle hugely with all the changes. I tried to get a desk near the window, where I wasn't so affected by the buzzing and flickering from the overhead fluorescent lights. I found the noise completely overwhelming and relentless. There was the phones, photocopiers, printers and constant interruptions. The worst thing was colleagues who talked non stop all day and just would not shut up.

At the time I had no idea that I was autistic. I repeatedly tried to explain to my managers how much it was affecting me. I was told that it was part of working in an open plan office and that I had to get used to it. They would repeatedly tell me that no-one else was complaining about the noise and that it was my problem. 

I begged my managers to let me work in one of the meeting rooms for a short time, to try and get some respite from the noise. Every request was refused, even though the meeting rooms were empty. I spent far too much time away from my desk, trying to get some respite and calm down. This was mainly in the toilets or in the stairwell area. 

It was affecting the quality of my work significantly. I found myself working very late every evening, to try and get some work done after colleagues had gone home and the office was quieter. 

I wish I'd known I was autistic. My managers might have been more understanding and they would have had to agree to reasonable adjustments.

Luftmentsch said:

I would leave the office at the end of the day feeling as if I had been physically assaulted, incredibly exhausted and overwhelmed.

I can really identify with this. I became increasingly burnt out by the long hours and having to endure the noisy and overwhelming office every day. I remember arriving home in the evening and sliding down behind the front door into a sobbing heap. Even weekends were distressing, as I would become increasingly anxious about Monday morning.

Eventually I couldn't take anymore and suffered a nervous breakdown. Most probably it was severe autistic burnout. I was signed off due to work related stress, but never recovered sufficiently to be able to go back.

Homebird said:

When lockdown arrived I breathed a sigh of relief as I worked from home at the same desk with familiar surroundings

I remember watching the news reports about people being able to work from home and being quite envious. That would have suited me perfectly.

This is quite an emotive issue for me. I had what could be considered a relatively successful career but had to give it up prematurely, mainly because I could not cope with working in large open plan offices.

Homebird said:

I used to work in an office which wasn't too bad when I was in a small team.

At first mine wasn't too bad. I was in a small office with a maximum of 5 colleagues, who were not there a lot of the time anyway.

Homebird said:

Then came hot desking which became less comfortable as there was always the decision where to sit. I guess I masked the difficulty to a certain extent. Then we moved to a completely open plan building.

The businesses I worked for seemed to keep changing and reorganising things for no good reason. Every change proved harder for me to cope with. Every reorganisation seemed to involve moving to a larger, noisier open plan office. I moved jobs to try and get away from the huge open plan offices. Then a few months down the line there would be another reorganisation...

I began to struggle hugely with all the changes. I tried to get a desk near the window, where I wasn't so affected by the buzzing and flickering from the overhead fluorescent lights. I found the noise completely overwhelming and relentless. There was the phones, photocopiers, printers and constant interruptions. The worst thing was colleagues who talked non stop all day and just would not shut up.

At the time I had no idea that I was autistic. I repeatedly tried to explain to my managers how much it was affecting me. I was told that it was part of working in an open plan office and that I had to get used to it. They would repeatedly tell me that no-one else was complaining about the noise and that it was my problem. 

I begged my managers to let me work in one of the meeting rooms for a short time, to try and get some respite from the noise. Every request was refused, even though the meeting rooms were empty. I spent far too much time away from my desk, trying to get some respite and calm down. This was mainly in the toilets or in the stairwell area. 

It was affecting the quality of my work significantly. I found myself working very late every evening, to try and get some work done after colleagues had gone home and the office was quieter. 

I wish I'd known I was autistic. My managers might have been more understanding and they would have had to agree to reasonable adjustments.

Luftmentsch said:

I would leave the office at the end of the day feeling as if I had been physically assaulted, incredibly exhausted and overwhelmed.

I can really identify with this. I became increasingly burnt out by the long hours and having to endure the noisy and overwhelming office every day. I remember arriving home in the evening and sliding down behind the front door into a sobbing heap. Even weekends were distressing, as I would become increasingly anxious about Monday morning.

Eventually I couldn't take anymore and suffered a nervous breakdown. Most probably it was severe autistic burnout. I was signed off due to work related stress, but never recovered sufficiently to be able to go back.

Homebird said:

When lockdown arrived I breathed a sigh of relief as I worked from home at the same desk with familiar surroundings

I remember watching the news reports about people being able to work from home and being quite envious. That would have suited me perfectly.