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Just Wondering If Anyone Else Has The Same Thing

Treevey134777

Hi,

Just a quick question. It keeps popping up in my head, especially at this time of year. Well, actually two questions. 

1) With Halloween coming up, I’m getting overwhelming anxiety as I have severe anxiety with people knocking on my door. I get shaky and can barely answer the door when someone knocks, even the postman and delivery people, I get so anxious sometimes I don’t answer and let them leave them in the safe space. Does anyone else have this? What can I do about it for Halloween?

2) With it coming up to Christmas, (it happens all the time, but Christmas is a trigger) does a you else get anxiety about visiting other people’s houses. Like I get anxious about the thought of having to go to someone else’s house that isn’t my house, my mam’s house or Nana’s house. They’re the only ones I can deal with going to. When I get there, after forcing myself to, I won’t accept food, drinks or anything, I kind of freeze up. I won’t move from my seat or anything. This has happened since I was little. We used to go visit my dad’s friends in various parts of the North East, and my sisters would bounce in happily to see them and accept hot chocolates, biscuits and everything and I’d just say ‘no thank you’ the whole time, even if I did fancy something they offered. 

I haven’t found any answers to what I’m looking for, I’ve resorted to calling it Threshold Anxiety/Syndrome. Not sure what else to call it. But it’s the same when I go to unfamiliar places like shops, community centres, medical places like hospitals, doctors, well-being places. Just wondered if anyone has the same things and what they call it. I put both questions together because I feel like they’re linked. I’m not comfortable going to other places, and I’m not comfortable with people coming into my place. Get what I mean?

  • Thank you for all your responses. I will take some on board. I do have a sticker on my door saying autistic occupant, no cold callers, uninvited guests, junk mail etc. But they still continue to ignore it, especially kids. I do have a very barky (but beautiful) dog that has been outside when the school kids are walking by, I’m kinda hoping she’s put them off coming into my garden. Aluna is a lovely girl, but nervous and barks if she doesn’t know people. As I say, I’m hoping people remember that it’s her house and go to the next one. 

    As for the Christmas and going to people’s houses, I will look into the Coping With Christmas workshops and see if there’s more support. My mam understands luckily, and she lets the older kids (my older sister, me and slightly younger sister, all in our 20’s now) open our presents on the Christmas Eve (which is a big relief to me as we don’t sit over each other to watch them open them), and we have a little brother and sister (7 and 6) who are both autistic, little sister non verbal, who have a full morning of them opening their presents and making it a day about their fun. It might not sound okay to others, but it does work for us, but then we still have to go to other houses and open them on the Christmas Day.

  • in reply to Fibonacci Squid

    Hi, it sounds like a good idea, but in the area I live in, the first kids to the door would take the lot and nick the bucket lol. It’s a very deprived area and the kids have no respect for anything or other trick or treaters. 

  • in reply to Robert124

    Hi, I didn’t know they ran sessions like these. I’ve not really been told of anything available for autistic adults in the UK. I feel there’s a huge lack of support for adults. Thank you, I will look into this. 

  • Do people knock on your door if you don't have decorations up? It may just be that my area has a few very religious, halloween is a festival of satan, families, but growing up it was always the case that you absolutely don't knock on doors that don't have obvious decorations up.

    If this is a problem for your residence, have you considered doing the good old leaving a bucket/ bowl of sweets by the door. Preferably with a sign saying how much to take (if some take more then that's on them not you). No interaction, and they shouldn't knock if they can get the treats another way.

  • You are not the only one struggling with Christmas and what it entails.  I attended a coping with Christmas workshop run by mind.

  • For Halloween, I'd just turn off any lights which can be seen from the front windows if possible. And close the doors to those rooms. Or draw curtains. children avoid homes which appear empty.

  • Halloween  - personally, I think parents should be with their children and they should only go to the doors of people they know. However, I cope with it by going to read in my bedroom which is at the back of the house and light can't be seen from the street.

    I remember freezing like that visiting people I didn't know well as a child. I didn't want anyone to notice me, I think, but eventually worked out that refusing things all the time draws more attention to yourself and, as I've got older I've got a bit more relaxed.

    Think that just my sister and her husband and a friend with her son who has Down's syndrome have been in my flat this year. 

  • Hi my Grampy says he's putting a sign up saying covid in household keep away and he thinks that'll stop any one coming to the house as cases are rising so u could try that if you like

    Halloween is my least fav holiday. I just hide in m room and listen to music or watch vids

    I get anxious round Xmas time just hate it and cant wait for it 2 be over and new year start.