Published on 12, July, 2020
I honestly want to be dead, I think it would be easier. I cant cope with the pain of life anymore. Its too confusing and stressful, Im not made for this world
I cant cope with having to go to the job centre every week, trying to find a job, worrying about money, dealing with my sons autism and his constant hitting, screaming and demands of me as well as my own autism. I cant cope with my wifes messiness meaning the house is a constant sensory overload. I cant cope with the fear of the neighbours hearing my meltdowns and calling the police. Just smashed up a washing basket with my bare hands in a meltdown and now my hands are bleeding. Dont want to live anymore
It's really hard when we tend to be all or nothing on the emotions and they can be overwhelming for us to process. You have a lot on and in time you'll see that you got through it. Try to take some time out from it all if you can or speak to someone. Try to break it down into chunks...get through the next few hours or next day and things will start to feel differently at some point. Hang in there.