Published on 12, July, 2020
I honestly want to be dead, I think it would be easier. I cant cope with the pain of life anymore. Its too confusing and stressful, Im not made for this world
I cant cope with having to go to the job centre every week, trying to find a job, worrying about money, dealing with my sons autism and his constant hitting, screaming and demands of me as well as my own autism. I cant cope with my wifes messiness meaning the house is a constant sensory overload. I cant cope with the fear of the neighbours hearing my meltdowns and calling the police. Just smashed up a washing basket with my bare hands in a meltdown and now my hands are bleeding. Dont want to live anymore
I hear you Billy.
The autistic imperitive to flight or fight when getting abused battles with the fact that you love them and they need you.
Is there anywhere you can hide for a few days away from the chaos? Family or friends? Camping?
You'll burn-out if you keep melting down.
Peace, strength.