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Frustrated at the lack of support for mild ASD

NAS81967

It seems like everything here, is aimed at autistic people with learning difficulties, what I believe was once called "low functioning autism". What irks me the most is almost all autism support groups are run by neurotypicals. It's like setting up a gay and lesbian support group but having a straight guy run it, or a single mother support group and having a married dad run it. TBH, I'm incentivised to set up my own group and also go into workplaces and explain about ASD/ADHD as I have both and I've had a negative experieence from NT employers who want to "tick a box" by having an employee with a disability on their payroll, but then expect them to act exactly the same as all their other, non-disability employees. In the UK, we have the NHS and say what you want about socialised health care, but as far as autism and mental health is concerned,m its absolutely crap. The person I saw even though autism could be medicated (she wasn't an autism professional thankfully). They set up autistic "coping skills" sessions...in the middle of the working day, so again assuming we can't "cope" with a regular job. Then even when high functioning autism is concerned, people assume we all like D&D, don't want to go to bars or clubs, and have really defined special interests etc. I feel having ADHD as well as ASD makes ASD a really different condition to just ASD on its own as it essentialy means whilst I struggle socially, I'm very spontaneous as opposed to regimented and organised, impulsive, and sometimes agressive. I'm so frustrated, I feel completely alone. Honestly, had it not been for my parents and my persistent mental health issues owing to social isolation, I probably would have gone un-diagnosed, because people just assumed I was "shy" and "clever". That's how mild I am.

Parents

  • It is interesting to read your post. I note firstly your comment about most people on here being low functioning. I guess I am probably of average intelligence but autism means it sometimes takes me a while to work things out. I find some posts in here difficult if they are very long and some concepts too complicated to grasp which I presume means they are of higher intelligence than me.

    I am different from you in that I don't enjoy clubs and pubs and do not find conversations in groups easy. However with someone I know I am comfortable with conversation 

    I am also interested in your comment about ASD and ADHD. My son has both. He only likes socialising with people he knows so can find groups hard. However where we differ he can be loud and can't concentrate for long which I can find hard when I need to relax at the end of the day 

    Finally, you say no one else seems to be like you, maybe others will relate to what you say. The thing that annoys me with some neurotypicals is they think they understand all about autism because they have done courses or met some autistics whilst not understanding it is a spectrum. I come into contact with autistic people in my work but although there may be some likenesses each one is also different in their needs. 

  • in reply to Homebird

    Yes exactly. The media portrayal of autism is not helpful.

    I also can take longer to understand things.

Reply Children
  • in reply to NAS81967

    Essentially all of the autistic adults who are on this forum are of average or above average intelligence. There is a definite problem with an overemphasis on autistic children that is found everywhere. Which seemingly ignores that autism is lifelong and autistic children eventually become autistic adults.

  • in reply to NAS81967

    I just got my ASD diagnosis a few days ago, but suspected it for years. Autism will have just as varied a population of people as Neuro-typicals. I struggle with the social aspect and just self-medicated through alcohol to push through the anxiety and bulldoze my way through social interactions. I wouldnt say I was an alcoholic, but I'm pretty sure any Doctor would say I needed to tone down my consumption.

    I've been voluntarily dry now for a couple of years, the social anxiety has come back but I'm old enough and ugly enough to just not care. Once I reach my limit I'm out of there.

    I've been a salsa dancer for quite a number of years now, when you are doing that back to back several nights a week people think you're being social.

    Onto the subject of mislignment between organisers and target audience, the issue is the people involved not to which group they belong. People that can swim help those that cant, People with money can assist those that have none. Do you really think that Martin Luther King would have had less impact if he were white?

    All people from all walks of life have difficulties with relationships and work culture, the only difference lies in the triggers for those difficulties.

    Also lots of different groups get stereotyped its just human beings being dumb. I've lost count of the number of times I've been underestimated based on my profession or appearance. I once walked into a Salsa Club, walked up to a young lady and asked her to dance her response "Can you even?" admittedly I am a white bald guy wearing glasses she'd never seen before. She didnt know I taught Salsa and even won competitions in it. Appearances can be deceptive.