• Replies 5 replies
  • Subscribers 84 subscribers
  • Views 960 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

Struggle to find social connections as an Autistic Adult

yjzhou

Hi all,

 So last month, on the last Thursday of the month, I tried to attend a social event hosted by NAS (or at the very least promoted by NAS on their website: https://www.autism.org.uk/directory/n/nassocial-goup-croydon). But unfortunately I couldn't find the people who were meant to be there. Additionally, the phone number, email etc. didn't work. I had to contact a lot of people to try and find out more information about the group (i.e. NAS staff unrelated to the event) and even then I couldn't find much information.

 But what is strange to me is that the event was held at a pub? And a very busy one at that. It was very uncomfortable for me with so many people and loud noises. However, I still tried to stay and find the group for about an hour. I asked the bartender if she knew about the group, but she didn't know anything about it. All in all, it was an extremely stressful situation. I think it would have been worth it if I found the social group, but I didn't end up finding anyone. Is the group still active? Does anyone have any information about this group?

 Why is it so hard to find autistic social groups for adults? I have tried for a very long time to find social groups - but most that I ended up finding was ones for children/young adults (<18 - I am 22) or autistic care homes.

 I really really want some friends in real life. Especially someone who is autistic like me. Do you guys have any tips or know of any groups in the Croydon/London area?

yjzhou

Parents
  • yjzhou said:
    Why is it so hard to find autistic social groups for adults?

    With regards to official NAS stuff it’s because most local branches are run by parents of autistic kids not autistic adults themselves. There’s something of a vicious circle there. High functioning Autistic adults are not keen to ‘buy in’ as volunteers when they see the organisation has no enthusiasm for providing events for people like them. Which in turn means no one ever challenges the assumption of parents that offering services for kids is the primary purpose of the group.

    I don’t see much way around it bar allowing competing (child v adult) branches in the same area (inefficient as a use of resources) or forcing some sort of quota of events for adults on local branches (fair but likely to alienate existing volunteers)

Reply
  • yjzhou said:
    Why is it so hard to find autistic social groups for adults?

    With regards to official NAS stuff it’s because most local branches are run by parents of autistic kids not autistic adults themselves. There’s something of a vicious circle there. High functioning Autistic adults are not keen to ‘buy in’ as volunteers when they see the organisation has no enthusiasm for providing events for people like them. Which in turn means no one ever challenges the assumption of parents that offering services for kids is the primary purpose of the group.

    I don’t see much way around it bar allowing competing (child v adult) branches in the same area (inefficient as a use of resources) or forcing some sort of quota of events for adults on local branches (fair but likely to alienate existing volunteers)

Children
No Data