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Dejected.

Hellbell

Last week I posted that I received my formal diagnosis last week.

My son is the only family member who has been supportive. The rest of them haven’t contacted me, responded or acknowledged it. I did a lot for the family in times when they needed support I mean a lot. Organising care for older ones, sharing my home during covid lockdown, fetching and transporting, lending money, listening to them in troubled times even tho it was incredibly difficult emotionally for me. 

what have got in return? Nothing, not one call, message, and it hurts me deeply and ignored.
I feel invisible.

Parents

  • I would do the following, if I were you. Create a written document to send by email, text message or letter, as appropriate, to each of your relatives. You might start by saying that you were surprised at their lack of response to the news of your diagnosis. Then say that you presume that this is due to their lack of knowledge of autism. Give an outline of what autism is. Then give a detailed description of how your autism affects your daily life, the anxiety, difficulties with social interactions, distress when routines are disrupted, sensory issues and suchlike. Make a point of emphasising the difficulties you experienced in helping them out, problems with making phone calls, anxiety when interacting with care authorities etc. Finish by saying that you are happy to discuss anything that you have told them and answer any questions they might have.

    I would try to make it as dispassionate as possible, while making it clear by inference that they have hurt you by their indifference.

Reply

  • I would do the following, if I were you. Create a written document to send by email, text message or letter, as appropriate, to each of your relatives. You might start by saying that you were surprised at their lack of response to the news of your diagnosis. Then say that you presume that this is due to their lack of knowledge of autism. Give an outline of what autism is. Then give a detailed description of how your autism affects your daily life, the anxiety, difficulties with social interactions, distress when routines are disrupted, sensory issues and suchlike. Make a point of emphasising the difficulties you experienced in helping them out, problems with making phone calls, anxiety when interacting with care authorities etc. Finish by saying that you are happy to discuss anything that you have told them and answer any questions they might have.

    I would try to make it as dispassionate as possible, while making it clear by inference that they have hurt you by their indifference.

Children
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