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Advice for diagnosis

NAS81524

I have recently been volunteering this summer for a play scheme for special needs. One of the ladies there has a lot of experience with autism and she can see the characteristics in me. My family, friends, partner and Myself have thought I am autistic for a while now but my doctor told me that I get through life fine so I don’t need a diagnosis. However, I feel that I am struggling with life more than ever because I am struggling to understand who I am and why I do/feel the way I do. I find social situations hard, struggle with social interaction which makes work hard as I feel very isolated, I struggle to regulate my emotions and often have meltdowns and cause arguements because I feel so overwhelmed. I find it hard to maintain healthy relationships with friends, family and partner. I try to be as ‘normal’ as I can so I am accepted in society but after social interaction I am drained mentally and physically from trying to act socially acceptable. Is it worth me fighting for a diagnosis as I am looking to go to university and would like to try to understand myself as much as possible 

  • I hear a lot of stories like this about GPs they sound completely useless when it comes to getting a diagnosis. I was lucky that I got diagnosed when I was 4 by the sounds of it. I have spoken to the GP about autism related problems and they don't want to know. Makes you feel alone and like you've no one to talk to.

    I would change GP if I was you. You want someone who is going to hear you out and explore the options with you not someone who shrugs you off.

    Congratulations on your volunteering as well that's a huge achievement and very rewarding for you and others.

  • Bless you!  I am sick to death of hearing stories like yours about GPs trotting that "maybe you are, but you can cope" line.  They aren't living your life.  I'd make a list of all the reasons why you think you might be autistic, print off and do an AQ50, and a list of reasons why you think you would benefit from a diagnosis. Aside from the problems you list above, you might get better support at university.  I'd then talk to another GP.

    It isn't good enough for them to sit in judgement on our lives like this.  YOU are living your life, not your GP and you are the best judge of whether or not you need an assessment, not the GP.  And I strong believe that every self-identified person who wants an assessment should get one.

    That said, even if you make it past that hurdle, the waiting times are awful.  For that reason, you might want to go private if you can afford it.

    Honestly, some GPs need to wake up to the fact that for every autistic adult who is identified in time, there is potentially an autistic adult who may look OK now, but in being identified avoided a mental health problem later.  Ignoring us could cost the NHS a lot more in the long run.

  • Volunteering for anything is a super smart move - for any person - of any age - for any motive / reason. 

    You are already having your eyes opened - imagine how many more perspectives you will have gathered in another few years!

    You are also wise to start questioning yourself and your motives early - but let that be a slow burner.

    Just putting yourself out into the world and seeing what happens / evolves is a great plan for you now -surely?  Follow your current dream, even if it subsequently proves to have been a folly.  You have time.  You have space.  That's all you need right now?!

    Don't let others (who self-evidently can't know your true-self any better than you right now) try to explain the complications of your own life to you - it probably hasn't evolved enough for you (nor anyone else) to know just yet anyway -  and you don't want to get clinicalized prematurely?

    Pay attention to yourself.  Listen and process - but know that you have years to unravel this calmly.  Just keep plugging away softly and gently.  Sounds like you are already on the right track and that you just need to remain calm, patient and self-aware.

    Good luck, wise soul.

  • Hello! Great that you do volunteer work. 

    I think it will vary depending on your GP but by the sounds of it they won't refer you on because it's not affecting your day to day life. (on the surface anyway). I briefly mentioned it to an NHS therapist I was seeing but they couldn't refer me on because I hadn't shown any signs I might be autistic (they didn't come up in our sessions) so I ended up going privately for diagnosis. It was expensive (£1100) but has given me great peace of mind and a much better understanding of myself which sounds like what you're after. 

    I think you can gain a lot from just accepting that you might be autistic and reflecting on how that has impacted your life and how you can make things easier for yourself going forwards (identifying triggers etc). I personally found this forum to be a great help just reading about people with similar situations to myself and not feeling like the only one to have felt like this. 

    Sorry, rambling and a bit of a long reply! But happy to answer any questions you might have Blush