Published on 12, July, 2020
I don't think I know how to relax. I don't know that I've ever been relaxed. I have been very stressed for a long time. There's no one big obvious cause right now. But it has built to a level where its causing me physical problems, like digestive issues, joint and muscle pain, headaches, palpitations, all of which can make me feel exhausted and mentally low.
Doctors have recommended things over the years to try and help relax - exercise, meditation, mindfulness, yoga - and I have dutifully tried them all. But they either don't seem to work for me, like mindfulness, or they do start to work and I suddenly get ill. Exercise, for example, I've tried a few times. I start doing small amounts every morning and evening. I keep it very gentle and only progress slowly, and I started to feel the benefit. But then as soon as that happens I end up with extreme muscle pains all over, or a cluster of migraines, or sudden terrible stomach problems. Some of these are so bad they put me in bed for days, several has necessitated a trip to the doctor and one landed me in hospital. They can last days or weeks, but they all derail the exercising (or yoga or meditation etc) and make it difficult to return to it for some time afterwards. This cycle, of cause, only serves to make the stress and anxiety worse.
Has anyone else experienced this? Could this be related to ASD or ADHD? Any advice on what to do? How does everyone else manage to relax without getting ill?
Any advice or thoughts welcome. Thanks.
That is so great to hear. For me, if I can (I have a 2 year old!) I ensure it is the first thing I do when I wake up, before I leave bed even. That way, none of 'the world' outside (emails, social media, chat) has chance to set me off in a rhythm that is reminiscent of stress.
Setting a baseline that is just your unconscious mind listening to your breath ensures that is the natural rhythm you follow. It really is quite magical.
Good luck. I follow Asian culture a lot, especially Japan & parts of Indonesia, due to their committment to their way of life.
Calm is seen as an aspirational state in Chinese culture, where as in the west the NT world seems to hunger after experiencing thrills, adrenaline, or pushing yourself. So it is no wonder we all feel frazzled - as a community I think those with autism call out to live more in tune with out evolution, not this manmade horror show that is projected by media & consumer culture
Work less, relax more, smile often, laugh a lot - and buy a cat to copy, they are aloof, calming, primal, and sensitive. My spirit animal for sure
Good luck guys, keep the faith, and follow the sun
JT said:Work less, relax more, smile often, laugh a lot
I'm trying to get there without slowing my thinking down,
unless it says somewhere that hypervigilance isn't a way to do it
and my spirit animal is a badger, so it can be both
Why wouldn't you want your thinking to slow down? This is ultimately the point, well one of many.
Our natural paced breath is meant to be the pace you realise. Your racing mind needs to be allowed to slow to this rhythm
There are more states than just those two extremes. Moderation, middle way, homeostasis...all very good for stamina & longevity in life