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Rudeness

HollyTheWally

I just come back from a walk and I'm feeling a bit down. As it's a nice day I decided a nice walk through the country would be nice, which it was until I saw this woman. Seeing her was fine but I felt myself getting anxious as she came over to me and I had a feeling she would talk to me which I'm not very good at. She did talk to me and asked where this village was which I knew and she asked for directions.

I'm not sure how you guys respond when this happens but my whole body tenses up, my throat gets tight, my stomach knots and I can't say a thing. I try to, I want to but my brain freezes and nothing happens. This woman looked at me sharply and then she sighed and told me I was rude and she walked off shaking her head at me and saying about my rudeness.

If only she knew the massive battle I was having with myself at the time and how much I really did want to answer her question.

Once again autism and anxiety won and made me look like a horrible person.

Feeling very down and disappointed now.

Parents

  • That was a very unpleasant thing to happen to you. As difficult as it is try not to let it get to you. You are certainly not a horrible person for reacting that way. The woman spoke to you very rudely.

    I find it difficult to go out for a walk due to my anxiety. Like you I always feeling my anxiety increasing if I see anyone approaching, in case they try and talk to me. I try to just smile and say hello, while I keep walking, but it doesn't always work. I have reacted in similar ways myself, where the words just won't come out. It isn't nice.

    If she was asking directions it means she was a stranger to the area. That means you are unlikely to encounter her again.

    Maybe you could get one of the 'I am autistic' cards from here https://www.autism.org.uk/shop/products/merchandise/alert-card

    Hopefully nothing like that will happen again, but if it did you could show the person the card. On the back of the card it says the following:

    Autistic people sometimes:

    • struggle with change, new situations and talking to new people
    • get very anxious in social situations
    • feel overwhelmed by lights, noise and too much information
    • need extra time to process information, like questions
    • or instructions have meltdowns or go into shut down if it is all too much
Reply

  • That was a very unpleasant thing to happen to you. As difficult as it is try not to let it get to you. You are certainly not a horrible person for reacting that way. The woman spoke to you very rudely.

    I find it difficult to go out for a walk due to my anxiety. Like you I always feeling my anxiety increasing if I see anyone approaching, in case they try and talk to me. I try to just smile and say hello, while I keep walking, but it doesn't always work. I have reacted in similar ways myself, where the words just won't come out. It isn't nice.

    If she was asking directions it means she was a stranger to the area. That means you are unlikely to encounter her again.

    Maybe you could get one of the 'I am autistic' cards from here https://www.autism.org.uk/shop/products/merchandise/alert-card

    Hopefully nothing like that will happen again, but if it did you could show the person the card. On the back of the card it says the following:

    Autistic people sometimes:

    • struggle with change, new situations and talking to new people
    • get very anxious in social situations
    • feel overwhelmed by lights, noise and too much information
    • need extra time to process information, like questions
    • or instructions have meltdowns or go into shut down if it is all too much
Children
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