I'm 26 and it's weird because some people around me would say they felt these emotions during such and such situations but I could never feel this. Is this something up with Asperger's Syndrome?
I'm 26 and it's weird because some people around me would say they felt these emotions during such and such situations but I could never feel this. Is this something up with Asperger's Syndrome?
More often than not, this is the case. Even if I were to send you a link to a Colours Wheel, there will still be a disconnect between a feeling and the ability to identify it.
ProTip!! Here's what I've discovered works even better: Identify a function, an exchange, a system of movement. Use analogy or poetry instead of trying to find the 'feeling'. For instance, "feeling" betrayed, is not actually a feeling, it's the formula or form of what happened. In my not-so-humble opinion, there are a complexity of feelings all tangled up when one has been betrayed. It's never as simple as 'feeling' sad.
Feeling Lost. Lost is a thing happening, a thing in motion, am I misguided or did I misinterpret something or was I not given a map?
I think the dilemma might be the intensity of impact, which fogs up anyones ability to think with clarity and precision, coupled with the fact that language and identifications are already difficult for us, so accessing the part of our brain where we perhaps our connexions aren't as strong as non-autistics is already a bit murky.
https://neuroclastic.com/autism-autistic-solidarity-theory-of-mind-relating/
That's completely different from me even though I'm quite the thinker as well. But usually I think about how other people have wronged me in the past.
I'm the opposite. I feel this all the time and it can be overwhelming and crippling in the end. I'm a thinker and when I focus on anything like regret and guilt I can't get it out of my head.
I do feel like I have Alexithymia to some extent.
i dont feel regret, everything i do is right at the time and wouldnt have been done in any other way. so no one should feel regret, as no matter what they always do what they felt right and responded correctly according to their brain at the time so regret is a bit of a redundant feel that no one should have.
guilt, i dunno that one is dependant on your empathy and having wronged someone, and see you have wronged them ,then feel bad about it.... could i feel that? ... i dunno, as with my last point everything i do would have been right and not done any differently, if i make a mistake and it does wrong then that still wouldnt have been any different and id still have made a mistake, but yeah i can feel guilt for it and a want to put any mistake right. then id get pissy when i put it right and they dont accept my putting it right and making it even.
embarrassment, yeah, thats random. and usually based on social things,i dunno maybe getting bad attention and not being able to defend or articulate your point and then feeling like a fool as the spotlights on you and you fail to verbally win your point over and end up looking like a clown even when your point is pretty solid in your head and could win them if you know how to get it out.
mainly though i think the one that we look back on previous events though is cringe... im sure we all feel cringe, look back on previous things then cringe on it and it perhaps makes us even spurt out a verbal tic with how bad the cringe is.
Regret is when I knew I could've made a better decision but didn't. This is different from not knowing what the consequences would be or wishing I had been instructed better. Regretting not studying more for an exam I knew was coming up and aware I just made poor decisions, when in fact, the test was important to me. Regret carries a kind of remorse. However, if I wasn't aware there was more to study (I honestly thought it was just the one book), then it's not regret. It's a kind of sadness though, for what I didn't know.
I've felt humiliated by others. I've been given bad advice and followed which put me in an embarrassing situation. I've stumbled through an attempt to explain a thing and completely misinterpreted what I thought I'd read which lead to feeling a push to fix it.
Guilt is complex. It can be baked into the human psyche from codes received by society. It can be wildly NeuroTypical, used as a way of creating hierarchy, as it can create a sense of indebtedness, even if an illusion. I can genuinely say I've felt like I've made mistakes or felt under pressure to do things in a way which without another I would've done differently. Laws were created to keep some from doing things they would feel at liberty to do otherwise. I do wonder if a lack of guilt is due to being able to see consequence, see the connexion and therefore causality and not do things one might feel guilty for. It can be confused for many things. Misrepresentation of emotions or misrepresentation of a thing is a very NeuroTypical practice.
Another possibility might be in a lack of ability to identify emotions. Alexithymia. I didn't discover I had this problem until I was around 28.
