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SNOOPY SUE

Hi everyone

I'm a mum of a 17 year old son (Adam). After 15 years of going backwards and forwards to the GP asking for help and support and being told that "it's his age and he'll grow out of it". A locum GP finally agreed to a referral for autism assessment. It has now been confirmed that Adam is indeed on the autistic spectrum. Question is.. I really don't know what to do to support Adam. I'm not sure how much of Adam's behaviour is due to the autism and how much is due to the result of years of making extra allowances for Addy's behaviour and therefore allowing him to get away with more. 

Parents

  • Other people will be quick to point out that your son is badly behaved, or spoilt, and that you are too soft on him I’m sure. That’s the thing. It’s likely down to his behaviour that he ‘acts up’. He isn’t actually acting up at all, isn’t mean, isn’t spoilt, he’s just having problems regulating his emotions because he probably doesn’t know his triggers. It’s a learning process, for both of you. And as parents we don’t always know what helps. You know yourself, and you know how well you bought up your son. So if his actions seem out of context with what you know him to be, you can rest assure he’s having a moment, and it’s not down to his personality, if you know what I mean?

  • in reply to Catlover

    Hi.. thanks for the reply. You kind of hit the nail on the head with what you said. My partner (been living together for a year) doesn't know how to deal with Adam and just thinks he's lazy and is just throwing his toys out of the pram when he doesn't get his own way. I've spent Adam's whole life trying the best way I know to help and support Adam..  and I think the problem is.. all the behaviours that the GPs told me was "just his age" I have just.put down as Adam being Adam. I can understand how partner sees Adams behaviour as just being a stroppy teenager.. I'm just so confused how to be stronger in my resolve to address his behaviour without him resenting me.

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  • in reply to Catlover

    Hi.. thanks for the reply. You kind of hit the nail on the head with what you said. My partner (been living together for a year) doesn't know how to deal with Adam and just thinks he's lazy and is just throwing his toys out of the pram when he doesn't get his own way. I've spent Adam's whole life trying the best way I know to help and support Adam..  and I think the problem is.. all the behaviours that the GPs told me was "just his age" I have just.put down as Adam being Adam. I can understand how partner sees Adams behaviour as just being a stroppy teenager.. I'm just so confused how to be stronger in my resolve to address his behaviour without him resenting me.

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