Published on 12, July, 2020
I need advice.
About 3 years ago(when I was 15), I got diagnosed with ASD(Asperger's Syndrome to be more specific), I was kinda surprised, but everything made sense, I had a lot of problems autistic people have, for example, I used to have strong reactions to sudden loud sounds(like when my classmates started talking loudly at the same time, it felt like a panic attack and I would putmy head on my desk and cover my ears), I also have trouble getting tone sometimes(I get confused when they say it in a more agressive tone, especially if I don't know the person well). Basically, I presented a lot of autistic traits and quite a bit of people suspected I was autistic, some were even psychiatrists. But, my mom says I'm not, she says I used to look her in the eyes and could pick up when she was sad when I was a small child.
She claims she took me to several professionals(including the one that gave me my diagnosis), and that they all told me I was normal(my mom even made some brainwave scans), when I got the diagnosis, it was really fast, he asked a few questions, and I was give the diagnosis in the very same day. Am I really autistic? Or it was a bad doctor? The only other time I remember a professional thinking I was autistic, he game me a quiz(which I was not interest and all and half-assed it).
There is a lot of negative vibe about diagnose of ASD, as that is perceived as a disease or medical condition, that can't be cured and therefore the attitude is that everything is doomed... I have even met people who decided not to have children because they had ASD. I don't really see much sense in that choice, because no matter how hard it is, but communicating with family members will be always easier, than with other people. Also, my life experience was really great in my childhood and I was smart and up to highschool I considered rest of other kids as slightly retarded, as I was clearly superior to them in intellect, so ASD was explanatory to me why I was smarter(that and also I started to read a lot of books).
From my viewpoint, problems related with ASD are surfacing, when in stressful situations. That has a random element - you can be in some environment and look very normal to other people, but as soon as that environment change, you might have no doubts, that you are experiencing different sensations, compared to other people.
If you have a lot of autistic traits, that is a reason for you to have ASD diagnosis. You might be surprised how many of us look "normal". IMO for most Aspergers who are doing just fine, it is mainly useful to know what and why is happening.
To be fair, my reaction to loudly speaking people is not that dramatic - it can either cause me to raise voice or I can decide, that person is aggressive, so you clearly have more sensitive reaction to that than I have and I am also on a spectrum and I have no doubts about that if it is about me. I had only doubts about that if there was any point in getting diagnosed, as there is not much use for those who are adults and were going through challenges of life without any help, but finding things how they work the hard way - by trial and error and repeating until something was working out.