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No diagnosis but after some help and advice

JP87

Hi every one,

I've not had any diagnoses or seen any doctors but after some advice from people who maybe able to help.

My question is with relationships, I've been with my husband now for 8 years and I feel really bad as I think he feels I don't live him which I really do, he just says I'm not very affectionate, which I know I'm not.

Maybe at the start of our relationship I was more loving and normal I suppose you could say but now further down the line Im just not like that and he doesn't understand why, I always tell him I don't need all that cuddling/kissing, that isn't what a relationship is too me, but to him it's a big thing, but it just makes me feel uncomfortable although I do love him to bits.

Although I can be totally different with my 2 year old. 

I also find I can struggle with my moods and take this out with him, I just always feel so drained, to which I did have some meds for this last year which seemed to help after having a baby through lockdown got me at rock bottom. 

I never thought of anything along this line of diagnoses, untill my mom mentioned it too me. I'm not saying this is what it is but just looking for others experience to see if I'm not the only one out here like this. And wether it is something that I should maybe see the doctors about possibly?

Thank you all for listening, I'm very greatful of any advice any one can give.

Parents

  • Thank you both for your replies

    thank you, it's good to know I'm not the only one who feels this.

    I'll have a look at that spoons theory and have a read.

    Yes that's how I feel with the physical affection, I say exactly the same to my husband 'I don't need it' and I've also said that to him. That I show affection in other ways, my own way. 

    ) yes that exactly how we are, he still needs and want it but for me it's just not something that I need to 'function'

    Yes having a 2 year is definitely more tiring, I was always the same before him, it's just more noticeable now. 

    Thank your for pointing me in the direction of the test, I have tried that AQ50 and my score is on the lower side of the scale but says the score I have indicates some autistic trates. So with this do you think it's worth a chat to my doctor? I just feel awkward I suppose bringing it up.

    Thank you again

  • in reply to JP87

    Some people with Autism can have subtle traits, and slip under the radar undetected. If it's something you feel you would like to explore, then I would recommend the suggestion Catlover has given of doing some research and seeing if any of it resonates with you. 

    The tiredness you feel, along with your moods could well be linked to Autism, but could also be a symptom of something physical. It would be worth asking your GP for blood tests. Just over a decade ago I had gone from being a reasonably active person to suddenly feeling physically and mentally fatigued. It turned out that I'd got an under-active thyroid.

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  • in reply to JP87

    Some people with Autism can have subtle traits, and slip under the radar undetected. If it's something you feel you would like to explore, then I would recommend the suggestion Catlover has given of doing some research and seeing if any of it resonates with you. 

    The tiredness you feel, along with your moods could well be linked to Autism, but could also be a symptom of something physical. It would be worth asking your GP for blood tests. Just over a decade ago I had gone from being a reasonably active person to suddenly feeling physically and mentally fatigued. It turned out that I'd got an under-active thyroid.

Children