I think that most autistics who live life trying to fit in and camouflage, have a feeling of being judged for a lot of the time. I know that I did for most of my life, until I reached late middle-age, when I began to care much less what other people thought about me. I think that it stems from our lack of social instincts, we are intellectually trying to copy others, so that life becomes something like a performance. Of course, performances tend to be judged and there is always a niggling doubt that our 'acting the part of a neurotypical' is inadequate. This leads to confidence issues and heightened anxiety.
I think that most autistics who live life trying to fit in and camouflage, have a feeling of being judged for a lot of the time. I know that I did for most of my life, until I reached late middle-age, when I began to care much less what other people thought about me. I think that it stems from our lack of social instincts, we are intellectually trying to copy others, so that life becomes something like a performance. Of course, performances tend to be judged and there is always a niggling doubt that our 'acting the part of a neurotypical' is inadequate. This leads to confidence issues and heightened anxiety.
