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Aged 52 and Stuck

NeilStone1970

Has anyone else ever been completely stuck in their life, and out of ideas about how make things better? I’m 52 and diagnosed with Aspergers by my local NHS Mental Health Team when I was 45. I don’t have any friends and my only relative is my mother (who I live with) who is n’t able (and has never been able) to offer any support.

Problem is the Mental Heath Team did n’t offer any different treatment when they diagnosed me. Neither the NHS treatment (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) or any of the other therapies I’ve tried have improved my life at all. Most therapies end up with the therapist saying "why can't you jut do this" or "why can't you just do that" or, worse, give me a lecture on how I have face my fears. Basically grow a pair and just do it. Trouble is, that does n't help me at all. I feel put on, demoralised and definitely not empowered or encouraged. 

I have anxiety about doing most things and feel depressed most of the time. That’s been the case as long as I remember.

I went to an Aspergers Group a couple of weeks ago, but I came away feeling even more depressed. Other people seemed were more confident and did all of the talking, and I just could n’t get into it.

 All the therapists I’ve ever seen just taught me a technique (like CBT) or got me to talk about my childhood and then told me to just get on with it. I need something else, but I don’t know what to call it. Some sort of long-term support I can keep going back to and I can get help for things that other people think are trivial, like the process of making friends, buying things, dealing with generalised anxiety. 

Any thoughts?

 

Thanks

Parents

  • Hi Neil, I can relate 100%. I am 38. 
    What I learned is no therapy or medication is going to help me. I am what I am.
    I decided to make the best of what I am within my limited means.

    I decided to accept a couple truths:
    1. I am,a psychopath and everyone hates psychopaths.
    2. I am severely autistic and the vast majority of employers do not want disabled workers like me.
    3. I struggle to look after myself in my home.

    So in terms of making friends I decided to find people who are social and moral degenerates. 
    And by that I mean criminals, bankers, traffic wardens, tv licencing goons, weridos, cult-followers and polticians.
    so far its going good. since I am morally dead inside we get on good. 

    as for work I do not bother applying for jobs because I know the answer, will be is no sorry you have not been successful. Getting hundreds of them letters can drive a person into depression. So I dont do it.

    Instead I do a little bit of chart reading on the financial markets, build indicators for trading and analyze economical data in exchange for gifted cryptocurrency assets. i meet my permitted work threshold and all is good. I may soon become a washing machine repair man if i can pass my driving test.

    The able bodied will never employ me so why should I pander to them? I dont think I should.

    I struggle to clean my home as im 1 track minded but to remedy that I have made sure I have the least amount of personal items as I possibly can own. that way my mess will always be small to clean. 

    You need to accept your limitations and make the most of your strengths. That is how I am trying to get ahead. Maybe it will work for you. 

    Tell me what you think.

Reply

  • Hi Neil, I can relate 100%. I am 38. 
    What I learned is no therapy or medication is going to help me. I am what I am.
    I decided to make the best of what I am within my limited means.

    I decided to accept a couple truths:
    1. I am,a psychopath and everyone hates psychopaths.
    2. I am severely autistic and the vast majority of employers do not want disabled workers like me.
    3. I struggle to look after myself in my home.

    So in terms of making friends I decided to find people who are social and moral degenerates. 
    And by that I mean criminals, bankers, traffic wardens, tv licencing goons, weridos, cult-followers and polticians.
    so far its going good. since I am morally dead inside we get on good. 

    as for work I do not bother applying for jobs because I know the answer, will be is no sorry you have not been successful. Getting hundreds of them letters can drive a person into depression. So I dont do it.

    Instead I do a little bit of chart reading on the financial markets, build indicators for trading and analyze economical data in exchange for gifted cryptocurrency assets. i meet my permitted work threshold and all is good. I may soon become a washing machine repair man if i can pass my driving test.

    The able bodied will never employ me so why should I pander to them? I dont think I should.

    I struggle to clean my home as im 1 track minded but to remedy that I have made sure I have the least amount of personal items as I possibly can own. that way my mess will always be small to clean. 

    You need to accept your limitations and make the most of your strengths. That is how I am trying to get ahead. Maybe it will work for you. 

    Tell me what you think.

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