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Trouble eating

Rainbowgirl

I have a very big struggle eating food. There are times I can enjoy food... but mostly I am very overwhelmed by the textures and end up almost throwing it back up. My average attempt at eating involves me gagging at multiple points unless it's a small snack.

A lot of times in my life people have accused me of restricting my eating on purpose to be skinny. Truth is that I HATE being skinny, I hate my body and I wish that I had a more normal/healthy looking one. I often force myself to eat to try and solve this problem but there's only so much I can do before it makes me sick and my attempt is for nothing. So many days I have to just settle and accept that I can't eat as much as I want to.

It is a sensory issue around food 100%. I often wish that I could consume my calories in a liquid form only so that I wouldn't have to go through the painful process of eating. I'm amazed and jealous of those who enjoy eating, even those who enjoy it so much they find it hard to stop, it's just like the reverse of my situation. 

I don't even have "safe" foods, some are worse than others that I have to completely avoid but any texture in my mouth can set it off. 

I have briefly approached the subject with my doctor but have had it misunderstood completely so I stopped mentioning it. I feel like I'm stuck.

Does anyone else have this problem and how have you overcome it?

Parents

  • Hello Rainbowgirl,

    I am sorry to read about your problems with food and I can relate to this as I too have suffered all my life with food textures. Trying to explain to others is more of an issue as I was labeled a fussy eater. I have experimented and have found a small selection of foods I like. I find eating small portions works well as I am unable to eat large amounts. I cycle a lot and find this seems to help settle my stomach. I tend to eat more to fuel this activity so that helps me when selecting food. Eating out is not something I do verry often due to finding somewhere that is willing to serve small portions but I have found a nice restaurant that is willing so that is something worth  trying. Have you heard of the term AFRID? This covers all my food issues and there is a good website that has lots of information.

    https://www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk/get-information-and-support/about-eating-disorders/types/arfid/

  • in reply to LucyLandRover

    I glad you mentioned this. ARFID is something which many Autistic people have, and they don’t even realise it. It’s quite a new diagnosis (I think). My niece has it. 
    Many girls are diagnosed with Anorexia instead of ARFID, because no one knows much about it, and it’s easy to label girls with these types of things instead of getting down to the root of the problem!

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  • in reply to LucyLandRover

    I glad you mentioned this. ARFID is something which many Autistic people have, and they don’t even realise it. It’s quite a new diagnosis (I think). My niece has it. 
    Many girls are diagnosed with Anorexia instead of ARFID, because no one knows much about it, and it’s easy to label girls with these types of things instead of getting down to the root of the problem!

Children