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Adult Female with ASD

Oscie

Hello there,

I have an issue that I wanted to ask other mature females with ASD. I am in my late fifties. I have some of the classic signs of autism for as long as I can remember. However, over the decades I have 'tweaked' them to appear like everyone else. This is now working against me, as at my ASD assessment the assessor said she thought that I just have a sensory disorder, but that doesn't explain all the other issues mainly with communication that I have. I tried to be as authentic as possible, but I am concerned now that the masking has left it's mark so well, that it almost feels part of me without me being aware. I am worried about being under diagnosed, especially as she mentioned the lack of services!

I am not too sure what to do about this, any advice would be welcomed.

Parents

  • My daughter was 15 when she finally got her assessment, and she didn’t get diagnosed because she masked her way through it, unintentionally. We were told to trust the professionals! Rubbish. Some of the things they mentioned was the fact she dresses well, is pretty, likeable, funny, smiled, seemed embarrassed at one point, and shrugged her shoulders, and had imagination. Obviously they haven’t seen her at home! 
    We went private 2 years later and she got several diagnoses.

    When I had my assessment recently, I had to unmask as much as possible. It felt very fake, but it was important that he got to see me as I am. If I had gone in masking I would have shaken his hand firmly, smiled, nodded, looked extremely attentive while staring in his eyeballs! I’m a 48yr female.

    I would write down some examples of how your lack of communication understanding affects you. List what you can and can’t do, and what makes you extremely uncomfortable. Talk about how you were as a child if you can remember, friendships or lack of, etc. the more information you can give on each area of diagnosis criteria the better.

    Regardless, someone who knows what they are doing will ask you the right questions, and look at everything carefully. They should already know that masking is a thing.

  • in reply to Catlover

    Thanks, everything seems such an effort. When I spoke about how it would have been helpful to my mother, if she had known that she was probably autistic too, the assessor simply said that there would have been no point as there were no services! As if that was the only reason for knowing the truth. These people are trained to doctorate level and I have lost confidence in the system already.

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  • in reply to Catlover

    Thanks, everything seems such an effort. When I spoke about how it would have been helpful to my mother, if she had known that she was probably autistic too, the assessor simply said that there would have been no point as there were no services! As if that was the only reason for knowing the truth. These people are trained to doctorate level and I have lost confidence in the system already.

Children