I have been with with my boyfriend Chris, for 1.5 years now, we are happy and we recently talked about moved in together...
Some days though, I feel like I'm holding him back. I struggle massively with interacting with others, I cannot socialise, so when he goes out sometimes he will ask me to join, where I prefer my own company and his - of course. But I worry that that there's a part of him that resents me. He is understanding and caring, my goodness I've kept him on his toes, barely speak to him most days, but that's the thing. He is not exactly a social butterfly, but he is confident and bubbly and I feel like we are most definitely chalk and cheese. He has at times made comments which he mutters under his breath regarding the way I handle myself in social situations. And when he asked me to find a message from his mum on his phone, I saw messages between him and his friend talking about us as a couple. Like I said we have only recently started to talk about moving in together, my suggestion can I just say, but he seems up for it. The conversation is led by him saying that I was in one of my moods today, to which his friend then mocks saying when is she never, she's a woman. Typical guy banter yes? However, Chris then told his friend that at times it's like talking to a brick walk, expect he gets more stimulation out of the wall. I feel hurt by these comments like anyone else would. I approached him and he just said that it was a conversation that got out of hand and he didn't mean it to come out the way I took it. We have been together for 1 years plus now, but I feel like we are coming to a halt - something we have been through before. I feel guilty, he deserves better and I hold him back. He wants to go travelling this year and I just can't. I've sat and explained to him the best way that I can but he just doesn't get it.
Do you guys ever feel like your partner deserves better? Do you feel guilty?
Do you live with your partner?
How do they handle your ASD?
