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Coping with loneliness

Kj

I just wanted to see if anyone struggles with this as I do?

I'm 35 and I have no family whatsoever (difficult childhood) except my 2 children, I have no partner and no friends as I seem unable to maintain any friendships due to my lack of social skills and understanding and I just feel so alone in this world that I don't understand and feel alien in!! I have a part time job but other than work, the school run and walking my puppy, I don't go out. I feel like such a failure and a bad example to my children (my eldest is also autistic) and keep obsessing about how alone they would be if anything happened to me as I have no family to support them when I'm gone.

I have no one I can talk to about being autistic as the only other person I know who has autism, is my 15 Yr old daughter but I'm supporting her and caring for her.

Maybe I just needed to vent and get this off my chest but I feel like I've become invisible. I used to take pride in my appearance but now I care but don't see the point so make no effort. My children must be embarrassed to be seen with me, poor things. 

It just feels like the world is so big and everyone else knows how to navigate their way around and have people around them to help and Im just lost, on my own Pensive

Parents

  • That sounds hard.  But the thing is, you aren't alone, really.  I push people away too, on a face-to-face basis, and so do many people here.  I actually do it almost knowingly because the effort is sometimes too much, and dealing with people can be so difficult, but I know others do it without really being aware of it at the time.

    You're obviously a caring, loving parent.  And if you hang out here, people will always talk to you.  Is there a local branch of the NAS that you can get involved with, where you'll meet people more like you?  I know it's hard with children but maybe there's a way of exploring that?

    Whatever, sending you bucket loads of the empathy we're all supposed to lack(!) 

  • in reply to PersonAnon

    Thank you Person Anon for your reply. I understand what you mean about not being alone, really but I honestly can't see the evidence that suggests otherwise. Apart from my children, I really don't have any other family and I'm really bad at maintaining friendships... It's been a constant theme in my life.

    I know you said you push away people but I hope there are some people in your life that you can turn to and support you?

    Thanks for your buckets of empathy. I find it amusing that it's a common misconception that we're supposed to lack it when some of us actually get overwhelmed with empathy! 

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  • in reply to PersonAnon

    Thank you Person Anon for your reply. I understand what you mean about not being alone, really but I honestly can't see the evidence that suggests otherwise. Apart from my children, I really don't have any other family and I'm really bad at maintaining friendships... It's been a constant theme in my life.

    I know you said you push away people but I hope there are some people in your life that you can turn to and support you?

    Thanks for your buckets of empathy. I find it amusing that it's a common misconception that we're supposed to lack it when some of us actually get overwhelmed with empathy! 

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