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Really struggling

MrsG

I'm waiting for my diagnosis and am currently suffering from a major breakdown.  I am currently signed off from work because of anxiety (I just can't cope being around others) and I'm due to go back to work on 17th but the idea of it is just making me so anxious.  I've got to the point now where I can't leave the house alone (without my husband or sons).  I was trying to come off the anti depressants but I'm now back on them because I just want to shut myself away from the outside world.  I am gaining a much greater understanding of autism and how it affects me and I thought that meant I was coming to terms with it but gosh I feel so very low at the minute.  I just don't see how I can continue working and this is really scaring me because I think my husband will leave me if I don't work.  

  • in reply to Billy87

    Thank you so much for your message.  It really means a lot to me to know that others understand how I feel.

    I was coping (to a point) at work before by allowing myself calming time in the toilet but on the last occasion I just couldn't calm down - it just felt so overwhelming.

    I love working with children (I think it's their lack of judgement) but being around adults drains me so much.  I just don't know what to do but messages like this help so very much.

  • Hi Mrs G,

    So sorry to hear about your situation. It sounds really tough. I work in education too so I understand how overwhelming it can be, especially with other adults. I always used to hide in the toilet at my old school for hours on end. 

    Does your husband know about your autism if you dont mind me asking? If he does, maybe he could read up on it and that would make him more understanding of how you feel and what goes on inside your head. Dont know but maybe

    Just take some time to look after yourself and be good to you. No job is more important than that. Hopefully your husband will come to understand eventually 

    You have a whole community of people here who understand and we are all here for you 

  • in reply to SarahMod

    Thank you very much for your reply 

  • in reply to aidie

    I wouldn't be able to do my current job from home but I could do another role from home and to be honest it's the route I'd like to go down really.  I struggle so much just getting out of the house at the moment without my husband or sons so don't understand how I can go back to work.

    Money wise we could manage it would just be extras that we'd have to do without which to be honest I'm fine about but my husband isn't really seeing it from my point of view.

    Thank you so much for your reply - I really appreciate your time.

  • in reply to Desmond79

    Yeah it's social fear for me too.  I actually work in a school and I'm fine with children but gosh I really struggle with adults and it causes me major meltdowns - I end up in the toilet trying to calm down.

    I don't think I'll be able to go back so I'll have to get another sick note from my GP   

    Thank you so very much for your reply - I really appreciate your time.

  • tough one because as bad as work is it gets u money  ---- no one here knows your economic situation. Would leaving work put your family in financial difficulty ?   

    would u be able to work from home ? 

  • Safe Hugs, Mrs G.

    Signing off work is probably for the best; I was signed off in January, and now have to ask for a new sicknote.

    Social Fear is a major issue. How understanding is your GP?

    If things get too much, perhaps call Samaritans. (they're not just for suicidals, but for those in isolation wanting another voice to hear)

  • Hi Mrs G - Sounds like you are in tough place right now, sorry to hear! I have posted so links below that might be helpful but as a more specific question, have you told your work that you need some time off for health reasons? Some companies have this possiblity and can be quite accomodating. Also have you looked into talking to someone professionally about the anxiety and how to cope with it? I really hope it all gets better for you soon.

    You might like to have a look at our guide ‘Support at work – a guide for autistic people’ which you can find here: https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/topics/employment/support-at-work/autistic-adults 

    If you were interested in counselling (NHS & private), you may like to have a look on the Autism Services Directory: https://www.autism.org.uk/directory under ‘Health & Counsellors’. If there are no counsellors in your area on the directory, you may like to try the links suggested at end of this webpage: https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/topics/strategies-and-interventions/strategies-and-interventions/counselling#H2_6 

    Wishing you the best,

    SarahMod