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Giving up on life.

NAS75920

Hi I'm Joe,

I was diagnosed with Asperger's a year ago at 35 years old and my life has got very depressing since. Coming to terms with my diagnosis has been very hard, especially due to the complete lack of support that the NHS and diagnosis service has provided. After my diagnosis I went back to my useless GP and asked if there was any support but he said no and when i mentioned my depression coming back he just prescribed me some anti depressants with no counselling (i threw the prescription away as I have been on antidepressants before and don't want to use them again). I have sourced my own support (from Diversity North East who are wonderful) in terms of trying to get a job that I actually enjoy doing. But my social/love life is still non existent. 

I have always been (as my family likes to put it) a loner and struggled with relationships, whether that's with family or friends but this has got a lot worse over the past few years. During my 20's, my life was actually very enjoyable for me as I was heavily involved in the rave scene and taking lot's of MDMA and LSD. As with everything good times don't last. Then at 29 years old most of my friends within the rave scene had stopped taking drugs and settled down to start families and be more responsible. This is when I quit drugs and tried to follow suit, but my depression manifested itself due to loneliness. I do look back now and realise that if i hadn't been taking these drugs I wouldn't be hear writing this. Unfortunately I can't go back to that scene as all my old mates are out of it and I no longer live in the city anymore. 

Since moving to a small town just outside of Newcastle my life has become very boring. I tried to volunteer for a local charity (pointless me trying to make friends through socializing in a pub) in the hope that i could meet new friends but all the other volunteers were at least double my age, so that didn't last long as i saw no advantage to it. I do have a one friend who lives in my area but he has a young family and I don't regularly see him. I'll often have weeks of not talking or socializing with anyone apart from talking to my brother on the phone once a week. Life is becoming pretty unbearable at the moment and I am struggling to see a way out of it. 

Parents

  • Hi Joe

    I expect many of us here would love to help. From my analytical view it is terrible once the brain is stuck with a bad thought and we need to find some joy somewhere to focus on and stop spending anytime dwelling on negativity.

    Easier said than done though 

    I am currently in a group trying to address and reduce suicidal thinking in autism. Not easy at all as we don't let go of some thoughts.

    Any suggestions ??

    Yes I'm asking if iyt would help you to have a role in responding to autistic people who are distressed with negativity?

Reply

  • Hi Joe

    I expect many of us here would love to help. From my analytical view it is terrible once the brain is stuck with a bad thought and we need to find some joy somewhere to focus on and stop spending anytime dwelling on negativity.

    Easier said than done though 

    I am currently in a group trying to address and reduce suicidal thinking in autism. Not easy at all as we don't let go of some thoughts.

    Any suggestions ??

    Yes I'm asking if iyt would help you to have a role in responding to autistic people who are distressed with negativity?

Children
  • in reply to DaveAsperg

    trying to address and reduce suicidal thinking - important, very important, I cant tell you how important this is. I've never known anyone who did and would never contemplate it personally - but when I read about these cases of despar it just grieves me so profoundly. Epecially the young people - teenagers and 20s who are half a minute out of childhood. It's too hard to hear about it.