Hi
2 years ago I was diagnosed (as an adult) with Autism.
To a large extent I have accepted the diagnosis and worked past the deficits based assessment etc to be able to now identify positively with the diagnosis, however there is one aspect of the diagnosis that I find challenging that I have been stuck on for quite a while.
My mum died before I had the understanding that I was autistic. My autism I feel had a big impact on the difficulties with a sense of connection that we could feel with each other and I wish that we had the understanding that I have now when I was child so that we could have worked through those challenges which I think would have resulted in a closer connection and better relationship. I think that it is for this reason that I have recently transferred some of that longing for maternal closeness to another relationship in my life which is problematic for me as I realise that I am doing it and don’t want to as I realise ultimately this is unhealthy for what is essentially a friendship.
Can anyone relate/ help?