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My son and money

NAS75646

My son has always had problems managing his money and often finding himself in debt. When he goes into shutdown he just spends relentlessly without realising the consequences. Then becomes very depressed because he can’t afford to do anything. We have bailed him out to save him losing his job many times, how many times do we do this?

Parents

  • What does he do? How are his social skills? I work on emergency ambulances and have found numerous autistic peers, who seem to flourish in the role. It helps develop abilities to prioritise and socialise. In addition to this, it helps to put life into perspective due to the broad diversity of patients we meet and see, whilst often giving you a healthy adrenaline rush. I believe there is a lot of support available too. 

  • in reply to NAS75586

    Thank you for your response. He’s a salesman but works from home which isn’t good for him either, pressure to reach targets and doesn’t get enough exercise. I suggested that very role for him or even to do some voluntary job helping others to make him feel good about himself but he just never listens sadly. He can’t seem to help himself and I’m at a loss as to what else we can do.

  • in reply to NAS75646

    No worries!

    It's tricky and sadly not rare. When talking to potential candidates I find mentioning the average salary figures persuade the less keen. The basic is usually £25,000, but most hit the 50k tax bracket with overtime and unsocial hours. And with lots of training and promotion opportunities the only way is up.

    Sales is often highly pressured, so if he's not enjoying it, it probably isn't a healthy environment to be in. I'm sure you've tried but maybe explore things he enjoys.

    Money wise, you could get him to open a second debit card. Put a budgeted amount on it each month that wouldn't do any financial damage if spent. Then keep the other one (supposedly with a greater sum from wages) out of the way for essentials like bills. This should limit spending and potentially create savings. 

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  • in reply to NAS75646

    No worries!

    It's tricky and sadly not rare. When talking to potential candidates I find mentioning the average salary figures persuade the less keen. The basic is usually £25,000, but most hit the 50k tax bracket with overtime and unsocial hours. And with lots of training and promotion opportunities the only way is up.

    Sales is often highly pressured, so if he's not enjoying it, it probably isn't a healthy environment to be in. I'm sure you've tried but maybe explore things he enjoys.

    Money wise, you could get him to open a second debit card. Put a budgeted amount on it each month that wouldn't do any financial damage if spent. Then keep the other one (supposedly with a greater sum from wages) out of the way for essentials like bills. This should limit spending and potentially create savings. 

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