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Relationships and dating

JackF

Oftentimes I struggle with relationships. From learning about social impairment on the Understanding Autism course I hope to find a way to relate to others. I am not trying to reach out to anybody at the moment with any promises of intimacy. The COVID relief needs to subside more. I find that coming to terms for my desires happens to be difficult and I do not know the best way to express myself.

Any approach might begin with dining at a restaurant by myself expecting to meet another individual also dining alone in the hopes of meeting someone. With this, the gap is so big since my work hours do not help to have supper at a restaurant and I still live with my parents so I need another goal in mind.

Parents

  • I'm a married autistic woman. My relationship is a nearly constant struggle/battle and probably more hassle than it is worth. Do you have friends? Pre-relationship I found intimacy in my friendships. The downside to this is that you never get to share financial responsibilities with someone else and for many people this is necessary to take steps to live independently from parents. 

    I feel trapped in my relationship... 

  • in reply to M

    Thank you for your post, Michelle.

    Not seeing anybody I would call friend. Honestly when leaving England for America and returning to England when leaving any so-called 'friends' behind.  I had a girlfriend in America where we met at autism meetings with whom we shared intimacy but she wanted a promise and I was not able to provide her that. Our ideal shared house situation did not take place.

    That's a good point to mention in sharing financial responsibilities, Michelle. I see Internet training videos to bring out the 'warrior man' but I tend to shy away from those responsibilities of relationships, money and spirituality forming a triangle in the man.

  • in reply to JackF

    I think there are a lot of pressures in life. Intimacy can be found without a traditional relationship. Loneliness can be eased without that too. I suggest focusing on finding like-minded friends first and forget about the dating. I wish I could start over and I'd definitely seek out friendship first and see if intimacy developed with someone as a result of that, rather than dating and seeking physical attraction...

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  • in reply to JackF

    I think there are a lot of pressures in life. Intimacy can be found without a traditional relationship. Loneliness can be eased without that too. I suggest focusing on finding like-minded friends first and forget about the dating. I wish I could start over and I'd definitely seek out friendship first and see if intimacy developed with someone as a result of that, rather than dating and seeking physical attraction...

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