Ashamed/coming to terms with my diagnosis

I know it was mentioned here somewhere before that it’s not a good idea to tell people about being diagnosed with autism.

But being diagnosed and not talk about it feels like I have some dirty secret. Something I shouldn’t tell anyone. It feels like something shameful, something I should hide from other people because they won’t like me if I tell them. 

Feels like something to be ashamed of. 

How to accept myself and not be ashamed of myself if I hide so much about myself. I’ve never been open about my depression and I hid my suicidal thoughts (because I was ashamed of them). And now I’m hiding autism. And while depression it’s something that can come and go so it’s not permanent and I could use this as an excuse for not telling anyone (because I’ll get better soon anyway so why bother and worry someone), autism is not. It’s not something temporary. I won’t get better. 

And it feels like some dirty secret. 

Parents
  • It doesn't change you.

    Just like it doesn't change my wonderful son, he is just the most amazing person and he amazes me every day. However despite his bubbly smiley face and I feel he's happy when reading about emotions ( he's 4 years non verbal) the only page he the wants to look at monster who's  colour black for fear.  Despite what I do he feels scared. As a mum how can I help him not feel scared?.

    Maybe look at it like playing poker, everyone doesn't want anyone else to know their cards,  most people wouldn't talk about their most infinite feelings or thoughts, they try to hide it and they stress themselves out because of it. 

    Just remember we all have these feelings, the more I learn about autism I truly believe I am too and past  behaviours I have really relate and experiences I've struggled with.

    All I can say is embrace it, embrace help or assistance, think about what you what to do to make you happy? 

     

    Sob

Reply
  • It doesn't change you.

    Just like it doesn't change my wonderful son, he is just the most amazing person and he amazes me every day. However despite his bubbly smiley face and I feel he's happy when reading about emotions ( he's 4 years non verbal) the only page he the wants to look at monster who's  colour black for fear.  Despite what I do he feels scared. As a mum how can I help him not feel scared?.

    Maybe look at it like playing poker, everyone doesn't want anyone else to know their cards,  most people wouldn't talk about their most infinite feelings or thoughts, they try to hide it and they stress themselves out because of it. 

    Just remember we all have these feelings, the more I learn about autism I truly believe I am too and past  behaviours I have really relate and experiences I've struggled with.

    All I can say is embrace it, embrace help or assistance, think about what you what to do to make you happy? 

     

    Sob

Children
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