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aspbergers, should i disclose

Jazzydave

Hi everyone, I'm looking for some advice please.

I am a 56 year old who has lived my life thinking i was neurotypical. I have just been diagnosed as aspergers (which explains a lot of things in my life).

Im in a bit of a dilema as to whether I should tell my partner of 20 years.

We are on the point of splitting up at the moment, and we have kids together.

I dont want to blame everything on aspbergers, or grasp at straws with the relationship, but I do think its probably relavant.

If I tell her, I know she will tell kids, and Im not sure if I want them to know about it.

Has any got any advice, or been in a similar situation?

Thanks

Dave 

Parents

  • Does your partner have a general understanding of what aspergers is? I mean, if she doesn't, the discussion will be like "I have something to tell you ... I have been diagnosed with ... aspergers." And she might think it's a life threatening illness, and at that point, who knows how she will react. 

    Maybe say to her that you've talked to the doctor/therapist about how you communicate in the relationship, with the goal of improving your social communication with others, and based on what they've heard, they've diagnosed you with aspergers. And then you can explain what it is, and whether or not you'd like the kids to know about it yet or not. 

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  • Does your partner have a general understanding of what aspergers is? I mean, if she doesn't, the discussion will be like "I have something to tell you ... I have been diagnosed with ... aspergers." And she might think it's a life threatening illness, and at that point, who knows how she will react. 

    Maybe say to her that you've talked to the doctor/therapist about how you communicate in the relationship, with the goal of improving your social communication with others, and based on what they've heard, they've diagnosed you with aspergers. And then you can explain what it is, and whether or not you'd like the kids to know about it yet or not. 

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