Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi,
Sorry I've been posting on here such a lot recently. I was just wondering if anyone can relate to this.
Did you find it hard to come to terms with, when you first realised you might be autistic? I haven't yet been diagnosed, but I'm becoming more and more sure that I am autistic, the more I find out about autism and recognise the signs in myself.
I'm finding that it's very hard for me to concentrate on work at the moment, and I'm just feeling upset, tense and unsettled. Also really anxious.
I don't know if this is normal or if anyone else experienced this when you were at a similar stage?
I don't know if I should try to fight it and carry on as normal, or give myself a bit of slack and try to rest a bit more when I can.
Like several others, there are some great and interesting replies. I felt it might be useful for me to add yet one more, and hopefully it will be of some help.
I'm now in my 40s, married, good job, was diagnosed with learning disabilities as a child but then Asperger's in 2007. At the time of the diagnosis, I didn't really care too much. I was me, I found my place in life, and everyone thought I was generally doing okay. I honestly thought I HAD come to terms with being on the autistic spectrum. I wasn't on any medication or having to see doctors.
Unfortunately, it wasn't until prolonged stress (and family deaths) caught up with me recently and I suffered an Autistic Burnout, and I literally had regressions. That's something that none of us ever thought would happen to me. Since then, I've learned that being on the spectrum just means that parts of our brain are a little slower than the rest of our system (for example, I'm great with maths and logic, but horrible with emotions).
I accept that. And, I then was able to accept the fact that sometimes the "logical" part of my brain can have an idea before my "system" can determine how I "feel" about that idea. Essentially, I was thinking and acting/doing before my brain fully processed all of the data/information about "feelings" that might be attached to those thoughts/actions.
I don't mean to get philosophical, but once I accepted how my brain works, and that I'm just a little slow sometimes, but that's okay, stay calm, relax, and you'll get there...sometimes part of your brain gets to the destination before the rest of you, and you get confused and don't really know why.
I'm know everyone is very different, and no two people are alike (from another perspective, we're all the same). Regardless, once I understood how my brain worked (maybe because I'm a logical thinker in the first place), my world started making sense to me again. I was able to make connections again, and knew how to "sort" my thoughts. So, perhaps, that approach might work in a similar way for you as well?
All the best in your self discovery/understanding/acceptance.
I also believe the source of anxiety (at least for me, who is on the spectrum) stems from not being able to remember/recall "things" (words, feelings, everything). I have always had an excellent memory and am extremely thorough, almost as if my brain constantly is striving to retain every single fact. But, anxiety comes when trying to recall that fact, and struggle to properly put it to words. Go figure?!
I believe you are new so welcome to this forum
do you live in Northern Ireland / republic of Ireland ?
At parties, my wife shared a house with two Kiwi girls in London before we married. Of course, expat Kiwis are quite sociable with each other when so far from home, so the house became a regular location for Kiwi-dominated parties. One of the regulars was an importer of kiwi fruit to the UK, so there were lots of kiwi-related freebies.
blimey,,, must admit all the people I know are very hippie like ( parents where real hippies )
New Zealand