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Late diagnosis female

Sky💗

Hi only recently given  ASD diagnosis, as a female aged 40 I'm trying to understand myself more and not blame myself for trying to fit in with the neurotypical lifestyle I struggled so hard to adjust to, causing so much stress and other mental health issues. 

The  problem I have  is people I surround myself with are finding it hard to understand that I am actually Autistic (as I have seemed to  managed OK in their eyes all this time, so why change)

it's as if they think I've exaggerated how Autism affects me because they didn't notice. I have Masked alot throughout my life and just finding it hard to be accepted for who I really am at moment. 

Parents

  • Welcome :) Yes it is hard if family/friends are not willing to believe/accept your diagnosis. But you know it is true, so use that to build your inner confidence and don't mind what they say. They are not going to change how they see you, and would you really want them to suddenly start treating you differently anyway? 

  • in reply to BassFace
    BassFace said:
    would you really want them to suddenly start treating you differently anyway?

    For me personally - YES! I want them to accept that some things are more difficult for me than it appears, and that many of my behaviours are not because I'm rude...

    If I abruptly leave the room and don't return, it's almost certainly because I am overloaded and at risk of meltdown - so don't make a fuss (and I'm more likely to return).

    If I say something inappropriate at the hospital bedside, it's not because I'm crass or uncaring... it's because I'm freaking out at trying to deal with all the emotions running rampant, so my mask falters.

    If you want to have a serious conversation with me, the children must be kept out of sight/hearing because it's too distracting & stressfull for me (I'm cool interacting/playing with kids usually, but I cannot multi-task).

  • in reply to moon

    Your comment at the end reminded me...I was reading about auditory processing disorder recently. I didn't realise that it was a common thing among autists.

    Music blaring or too much chatter in restaurants is something that springs to mind. I also relate it to the fact that I never listened to lyrics in a lot of music when I was growing up (in the 90's, rock music especially) because the way the song had been mixed meant that the instruments often drowned out the voice.

  • in reply to Max

    Yes! My wife sometimes tries to communicate her emotions by making me listen to all manner of wailing music (Adele, Rhianna, Sam Smith? etc.) - can't understand a bloody word they say. I just nod & smile and go to my "happy place" until it's all over.

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